


White Smoke and Broken Mirrors

by yersifanel



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Collars, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mirror Universe, Rape, Slavery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-30
Updated: 2015-02-12
Packaged: 2017-12-25 02:27:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 9
Words: 39,045
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/947516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yersifanel/pseuds/yersifanel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>During the 5 year mission, the crew encounters a thunder storm that literally throws Khan at their feet. But this Khan is not the same they fought and the world he comes from is a shattered reflection of their own.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Many thanks to Kate for helping me by beta reading this. Also, stars, cupcakes and rainbows to my dear friend Alien Spine, who unknowingly gave me the idea for this story.

\-----------

_...Attention... System Failure… Attention... System Failure... Attention... System Failure..._

The notice echoed along with the alarms and the multiple displays of malfunctions as the small ship was rocked with the shock of attacks from the outside. The only person aboard the small ship ignored the alarms in favor of forcing an evasive maneuver, moving the ship out of the following attack and entering a dangerous asteroid zone.

The much larger vessel behind him came to a halt as the smaller, almost diminutive in contrast ship entered a range where the scanners would be unable to make an easy distinction between the small ship and the multiple asteroids in its path. It was a small advantage, but he was far from safe, his persecutors won't simply let him go.

He ran towards the back of the ship, where his destructive cargo laid secured in a special container. The pilot took a deep breath and after a second of hesitation opened the high functioning receptacle. Inside were several objects, the most outstanding being the various small vials containing a drop of Red Matter secured in it.

He took one of the vials and quickly armed another container, a cylindrical vase adapted to contain the vial with the dangerous matter inside. His ice blue eyes gazed at the small drop, his expression not giving away much as he silently decided his next move. He took a second vial; this one with a drop of blue sealed inside. He added it to the vase, preserving both vials inside.

The alarm continue displaying a failure in the ship's systems and he cursed his luck, knowing soon the life support system would be affected and any possibility of survival would be dramatically reduced, making his own possibilities of success almost non-existent.

The ship rocked as a nearby asteroid came too close, taking the man out of his stupor and reminding him how out of time he was. Making a quick decision, he ran to the back of the ship and placed the container inside an airlock, preparing to use it as his ammunition if necessary.

Running back to the main controls, the screens displayed the asteroid and the ship slowly but surely coming closer and closer to his location. The man barked in anger at seeing the ship and the attempt at communication being sent to his transport. He had been discovered, time was up.

Making an evasive maneuver in desperation, he launched the last card under his sleeve towards the space between his ship and the much larger one chasing him. He closed his eyes, feeling seconds pass as if they were years; he muttered an apology to no one and pressed the button that could make the vial he launched explode.

The vacuum of the explosion thrust the larger ship backwards and shocked the smaller one to the core. At the center of the explosion something formed and growled at an alarming rate, finally forming a black hole in the space between asteroids in the middle distance of the flagship and the shuttle.

The shuttle's pilot saw the black hole on screen and knew he couldn't escape it. His mind went blank as a storm emerged in the middle of the black hole and swallowed his ship only to collapse in on itself afterwards, leaving the severely damaged flagship behind.

\----------

A flash formed in an unknown point in space and from the emptiness something was formed in chaos, light and thunder, being the crew of the Federation's Starship, the Enterprise witness of the event.

They saw the thunder storm and Jim said nothing, but his eyes gave away what he was thinking and Spock was beside him immediately, looking at the screen and clenching his fits behind his back. They couldn't avoid the storm, it was too big and moving in strange patterns, but Jim was going to try anyway.

"Get us away from that storm, Mr. Sulu, we definitely don't want to be anywhere near it."

"Aye, Captain," Hikaru was not looking at him, his hands quickly moving over the controls and doing everything possible to keep the Enterprise away from the storm. It appeared to follow them as it grew stronger, almost catching up with them, rocking the entire ship.

As quickly as it had started, it was over. The storm faded into the darkness of space and the only thing it left behind was confusion and questions, or at least at first it seemed that way.

"There's a ship," Sulu murmured in confusion and worked on the controls to get a better view, "A very small ship, a shuttle most likely, it appear to came from inside the storm, Captain."

"On screen."

The small ship looked unstable and the Enterprise could scan a single life form inside it.

"I'm attempting communication," said Uhura as she looked between her controls and the main screen, "There's no answer."

"Open a channel, let us announce," ordered Kirk, his eyes fixed on the screen.

"Done, Captain."

"Attention, this is Captain James T. Kirk of the USS Enterprise, we are detecting major malfunctions in your ship, you are whiting out hail reach, do you copy?" There was no answer and Kirk give it a few moments. "I repeat, your ship is showing major malfunctions, your safety is not ensured, we have to hail your ship, do you copy?"

"Captain, I do not advise we hail an unknown ship," Spock pointed out, "Although it does look severely damaged," Spock frowned, "its life support systems will be affected."

"Hail the ship," order Kirk and stood up, "I will retrieve our guest and if it turns out to be hostile, well, we have the advantage. Mr. Spock you're in charge."

"Jim," Spock followed him to the turbo lift, "We have seen this before, and it could be dangerous."

"It was the Nerada last time... this is a shuttle and if something is coming, we need to prevent it." Kirk sighed deeply. "We have to."

Spock did not seem convinced, but nodded and Jim went down to engineering with an uneasy feeling stirring inside him. Past thunder storm in space had led to great damage, for it was Nero's passage to this time, what could possibly be crossing now?

\----------

The small shuttle looked way too damaged, it was practically a miracle that it was still functioning, or at least it appeared to be the case. Kirk had never seen a shuttle like this one before. The design resembled those of the federation, but there were several things that made it obvious it was not, starting with the marked emblem on the side; a sword running through the planet earth. It made Kirk feel uncomfortable.

Setting his phaser to stun, Kirk gave the signal to force the shuttle open, behind him several security officers were also ready to shoot if necessary, but when the shuttle opened no one came out, yet the scanners were not wrong, there was a life form inside that small ship.

"Attention, whoever is aboard this shuttle, I request your immediate identification!" He took a step closer, ignoring the worried gaze from Scotty and kept his phaser up. He saw a shadow loom near the door and almost shot by mere reaction and even more so when said shadow stepped into the light.

He forced himself to keep his hands steady, but behind him Kirk heard several gaps and more phasers being drawn from the rest of the security personnel.

"T-That's not…!"

"How did he escape?"

Several whispers ran around as the man they knew as Khan stepped into the light, but there was something odd about him, something that silently screamed _'wrong'_.

"Khan..." Kirk hissed with a stirring anger in the pit of his stomach and almost missed when the other man flinched. Almost. It was this action that made him look him up and down while keeping his composure as best he could, "How the hell did you break out of cryostasis?"

Khan lifted his eyes but avoided eye contact with Kirk, instead looked around while his right hand tightly clutched the fabric of his ragged black shirt and torn green pants. Kirk noticed the manacles around his wrists, which made his attention shift to the dark collar around his neck, poorly concealed behind a worn out piece of grey cloth that served as a scarf. He was thinner than Kirk remembered him and his skin was paler, to the point of looking sick.

Kirk stepped closer and Khan stepped back, keeping his head down and only lifting his left hand a little, Kirk noticed the makeshift bandaged around the manacle stained with blood, as if he had tried to take them off and only managed to hurt himself.

"I... I just..." His voice sounded rough, he lifted his eyes, there was defiance and so much hatred in those eyes Kirk almost flinched. Khan was gritting his teeth so hard it had to hurt, "You honestly expected me to just lay there and take another round, _master_?" He spat the word with venom in his voice, so clear Kirk could taste it. He stood tall, hands fisted at his sides and against his body to hide their trembling. "I will _always_ fight you!"

When Khan ran towards him, Kirk shot the phaser and the other man went down immediately, falling on his face at Kirk's feet, who kept his phaser pointed at him, knowing the shot was not likely to keep the augmented down for long.

"Secure him!" He had to rethink his order, not knowing how to cuff a man who was already wearing manacles. The Security officers were on the same page as him in this situation, because they took the other man by the arms, unsure of how to proceed.

They got the unconscious man to his knees and Kirk noticed the shiny silver tag hanging from the collar around Khan's neck, the tag that had Kirk's name engraved on it. It was then that Jim knew something was very, very wrong. 

A shiver ran down Khan's spine, slowly regaining consciousness. He analyzed his chances, finding them almost none existing, but he had to fight, he had to. Gathering all what was left of his strength and dexterity he quickly slid from the grasp of the security guards holding him. He pressed his body to the ground and rolled over to avoid being caught, narrowly avoiding the phaser shots aimed at him. His eyes fixed on Kirk and a snarl erupted from his throat. Once again he charged against the Captain, his forehead colliding against Kirk's in a painful hit for both.

Khan hissed in discomfort and blinked the blood out of his eyes, he was dizzy but he had a hold on the Captain, his hands around his throat. This was it, even if he went under the agonizer's control now, this satisfaction was enough to make it worth it, he looked at his so called master in the eye and... Did not find what he was looking for.

Khan stopped suddenly, his hands still around Kirk's throat but not giving pressure. The collar was not reacting, but Khan knew it was still functioning, why had Kirk not activated it yet? The man had his right hand around Khan's wrist and the other up, signaling for the Officers to not shoot. Khan looked around, confusion palpable in his expression as he noted the details for the first time. He looked down at Kirk again and let him go, scrambling to his feet and taking several steps back as if he had been burnt.

"Who—What?" The uniforms were different, the ship was not as he remembered and the look the Captain was giving him was plain wrong... James Kirk shouldn't be able to express such concern when looking at him, he shouldn't!

"Stand down!" Jim stood, hands up, still signaling for the others to keep their distance, "Calm down, ok?"

"W-What are you doing?" Khan asked despite himself, "Is this another of your sadistic games?"

His hands were trembling again and he hated not being in control of himself. He could feel moisture in the corners of his eyes, but his expression remained hard, not allowing himself to show any weakness.

"I should ask the same," Jim said behind clenched teeth, impatience building in his features, "Last time I saw you, you were in cryostasis, serving your sentence."

"Stop it!" Khan hissed, deep frustration leaking in his voice, "Stop playing with my mind! You would never allow me the mercy of cryostasis!"

Jim looked taken aback by that, but quickly stood his ground, "I don't know what you are talking about."

Without really thinking about it, Khan lifted his hand to grab the collar around his neck, tugging at the silver tag in anger as he ran his other hand through his hair. Jim stepped closer and Khan lowered his head, avoiding looking at him.

"Stop it," He was so confused, a part of his mind was screaming him to keep fighting but he felt as if his limbs were paralyzed and he cursed his weakness, "Just stop..."

Kirk got a hold of the hand clutching the collar, touching the manacle around his wrist, activating it. Khan felt the pressure as the cuffs were forced together by magnetism, he briefly fought against and in the end just allowed them to force his wrists before him, knowing beforehand the pain to come if he didn't do it and concluding it was not worth it. Kirk was frowning in confusion, as if he didn't know what he just did and that made Khan glare at him again.

"I did that," Kirk muttered to himself as Khan stood straight again, letting his frustration hide behind the mask of indifference, a carefully shaped blank expression that was his only shield now, "How the hell did I do that?"

Jim shook his head and motioned the Security Officers to come closer this time, he was surrounded immediately. Kirk gave him a strange look, looking him up and down and shaking his head.

"Take him to the brig." Kirk let them pass him, noting Khan did not fight the guards this time and seemed almost... resigned as he walked away.

This was not the man Jim knew, this man was not the same Khan he fought against only a couple years ago and the implications of that made Jim anxious.

\----------

Jim immediately went back to the bridge where Spock and Bones were waiting.

"Captain if I may—"

"Jim, what the hell?"

"Ready Room," Jim rolled his eyes, "Lieutenant Sulu, continue monitoring for anything else. Keep the shields up."

"Yes Captain."

Once in his Ready Room, Jim was assaulted with questions from both Bones and Spock about what just happened and what was he thinking. Spock did not voice them that way, but it was the same only with other words. Jim lifted his hands and in a second Bones was on him, tracing his fingers over a bruise around his neck where Khan had grabbed him. Jim hissed in discomfort and glared at his friend, who ignored him in return.

"You will need dermal repair for this," he mumbled angrily. "What the hell is he doing here?"

"Captain," Spock raised his voice, his tone impatient, "I made contact with the Federation to confirm Khan's custody status." He moved around the room to activate the closest screen, displaying the image of the secure bay where the cryotubes were contained and showing Khan inside one, deeply asleep in cryostasis.

"Let me guess," Jim said as Bones continue his check up and Jim let him, knowing better than to argue with the MCO at this point, "There haven't been any security bridges, at least not reported."

"Unless the system, our eyes, and every security process is mistaken, Khan is still in cryostasis and our unexpected prisoner is an impostor." Spock switched the image to the monitor in the brig, were Khan was sitting on the cell's floor, his back to the force field, "However, further inquires are required to confirm his identity, for his initial recognition data matches the one on file, which is not possible."

"He has a goddamn collar with my name on it," Jim gently pushed Bones aside to walk to the screen, turning the cameras and zooming in, "And those manacles look far different from anything I've ever seen before."

"Your name is on it?" Bones frowned and looked between Jim and the screen, where he was tapping at the silver tag hanging from Khan's collar.

"There," he didn't want to mention the fact that Khan had called him master and was altogether acting as if he was someone else. He didn't understand what was going on but he was determined to find out the truth.

Bones changed the image, looking at the footage and back to the live image of Khan sitting in his cell. It gave the impression he was trying to make himself look smaller.

"He looks different," Bones tapped a few images and observed them carefully, "It's subtle, but it stands out... he's skinnier to start with."

"They left the manacles on," Spock noted, "Or they can't take them off?"

"Probably the second," Jim remembered how the manacles activated when he touched them and Khan expected something else to happen as well, it so it seemed. "Bones, can you give him a check up?"

"I would rather not, but yes, I'll do it." He turned around to leave the room, "You think this is not the bastard we confronted before, do you?"

"Almost sure," Jim closed his eyes, "And there's that shuttle he came in, I need Engineering to work on it and get as much information as we can about it."

"Jim," Spock called and the Captain looked his first officer in the eye, "The Khan we know is in custody of a Federation Secure location, whoever this man is, it's not him."

"I know."

Evidence spoke for itself, something was wrong and they would find out exactly what was going on. They had to.

\----------

Jim was not sure what he expected to find upon entering the brig, but Chekov messing with the manacles holding not-Khan's wrist together was not it. The young Ensign was talking nonstop while using several tools to tap into the manacles' system, asking technical questions that went unanswered and mostly thinking out loud. However, what Kirk noticed was the haunted almost painful expression Khan was reflecting in his face while looking at the younger prodigy.

"Zis is harder zan I zought," Pavel said to himself, "You really can't giwe me a clue?"

Khan blinked several times, shifting his full attention to the younger man, "They are DNA coded..."

"How so?"

"Only the persons coded to handle them can modify the pressure..." Khan was looking at Chekov as if it physically hurt him to see the younger man, and it made Kirk uneasy.

"I can unlock them, right?" Jim interrupted, making Chekov turn around and almost fall if not for Khan gently supporting him, only to scramble back as much as he could.

"Keptin!"

"What are you doing Chekov?" Jim moved closer to the brig, noting part of the force field was lowered but Khan made no attempt to get closer to that part.

"We couldn't remove the manacles Captain," explained one of the officers, "We requested assistance."

"Zis is a wery complex zystem," Chekov pointed out, "Only managed to lower the pressure a wittle bit."

Jim walked closer to Khan, who had to force himself to not step back as the Captain reached for his bound wrists and eyed him evenly, "How do I take them off?"

Khan gave him a look full of distrust and Kirk waited as patiently as he could, even if inside he was cringing with irritation at the whole situation.

"Run your fingers over the top of the right one and the bottom of the left one," Kirk did so and immediately the manacles separated, but remained on Khan's wrists.

"I want to take them off," Kirk made clear, "Not just separate them."

"I...I don't know," he admitted, looking uncomfortable. "You... He... has never taken them off while I'm conscious."

Chekov was hovering over Kirk's shoulder, looking intrigued and Jim chuckled at this, "Can you take them off Chekov?"

"Not sure Keptein, zey are DNA coded but zey are vorking with you," Chekov frowned, "For some reason... Anvway, I can look into it!"

"See to it," Jim was looking Khan in the eye, while the other man was not, he continued looking at Chekov with an almost sad expression. He waited for the young ensign to leave the room before shifting his attention back to Kirk. "You look as if you just saw a ghost."

"For me, he is." Khan sighed, "Who are you?"

"Captain James T. Kirk, of the USS Enterprise," Jim answered with pride in his captain's voice and Khan still looked at him with so much distrust it was making Jim twitchy. "What?"

"I know a James T. Kirk," he said, "Captain of the ISS Enterprise... The similarities are uncanny."

Khan flexed his fingers and folded his arms over his chest, although it looked more like an act to shield himself than anything else. Kirk bit his lower lip and heard Bones and Spock entered the brig. Khan visibly tensed and backed up against the cell's wall as Bones came closer, almost snarling when he came even closer.

"Hey, chill out!" Bones grunted in annoyance and consulted his portal equipment, whistling as he read the first scans, "Boy, you're a mess."

Khan narrowed his eyes, gritting his teeth hard and closing his hands into fists at his sides, trembling in anger and not doing a very good job at concealing it. Kirk noticed this immediately and stepped between them, looking at Khan and showing authority in his presence to be reflected in his voice.

"Whoever you know, it's not him," he told Khan firmly. "You got that? We're not them."

"If this is another trick, you are being far too cruel," Khan whispered, his eyes on Chekov at the other side of the room, "You made me watch... and made it clear it was my fault."

"Khan," Kirk's voice reflected annoyance and it made Khan flinch, Jim forced himself to focus and not be affected by that unusual display, "I have done nothing to you."

Khan's hand went to the collar again, holding the silver tag between his fingers so hard his knuckles went white and exhaled slowly, "This might be a world different form my own... or I have finally lost my mind."

He took a few steps back to sit on the nearest bench, he looked very tired as he rested his elbows on his legs and lowered his head, breathing deeply.

"I need an explanation from you," Kirk said gently, "Your presence was... unexpected."

"I did not want to board your ship Captain; on the contrary I was doing my best to get away from the ISS Enterprise," Khan moved to rest his back against the wall, a far cry from the man Kirk last saw in the brig and still a shadow on him at the same time.

"ISS... what does the 'I' stands for?" Jim wondered out loud and Khan gave him an unimpressed look.

"Imperial Starship," He eyed the captain warily, "From the Terra Empire."

Jim just stared at him in confusion, but it was somehow making Khan less wary of him. Still Khan shifted his vision to look for Pavel, who was talking with Scotty at the other side of the room. He was so engrossed in observing the young prodigy that he completely ignored Jim for a while.

"Hey!" Jim raised his voice and Khan gasped as the collar activated, sending a pulse of pain across his back and making him fall from the bench, "W-What? I need McCoy in here!"

"M-Make it s-stop!" hissed Khan with watery eyes, "I-I'm listening!"

"Yes! That's, that's fine, you're fine or...hey!" Kirk hovered over him and finally decided to place his hands around Khan's neck, over the collar and the pain stopped, "What just happened?"

Khan's eyes rolled into the back of his head and he stayed down as Bones ran into the brig followed by two of his medical officers and started to run scans on their unexpected prisoner. Khan's instinct to fight them off was making things difficult.

"Come on, stop that!" Leonard's alarmed eyes were moving fast between the scanners from the tricorder and Khan himself. He had a hand over the man's chest to keep him down as much as he could while the other two medical officers kept him restrained as much as they could. Jim ran a hand through his hair and clenched his teeth, frustration building inside him.

"For God's sake, stay still!" Maybe he put more sentiment into his voice than he meant to, whatever the reason it may be, Jim adverted the phrase as an order and Khan stopped fighting at once. He looked conflicted and avoided looking at Jim while Bones and the medical officers did their job.

Jim felt a stab of guilt but at least the moment of outrage had served for something other than straining the already difficult atmosphere. Khan lay on the floor, avoiding looking at everyone, once again concealing his tension behind a carefully shaped blank expression. Jim folded his arms over his chest and observed the man on the floor, his eyes adverting to the silver tag more often than not. There was a storm of questions in his head, but the most prominent remain the same: who was this Khan? How were they associated? And why did he have the feeling he was not going to like the answer?


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many thanks to BotanyCameos for being awesome and helping me out with the revision of this chapter. 
> 
> **Warning:** This chapter contains explicit non-con.

Scotty's initial report of the shuttle marked as part of the 'Terran Empire' was, in Spock's recurrent words, fascinating. The ship was of optimal technology; even for a shuttle it was equipped with weapons of high capacity and defense shields. It possessed everything an explorer ship was to be equipped with and more. The main computer had several logs already being analyzed by the science division crew of the Enterprise and the ship itself continued to be evaluated alongside engineering. It was not only the weapons system that caught Spock's attention, but the contents in the small cargo area of the ship.

It was a complicated container, designed to secure its content with the best available resources, or so it seemed. It was most likely by mistake that it was open when they found it, probably left in this state by Khan upon his unexpected hail towards the Enterprise.

Spock carefully took one the vials holding a single small drop of Red Matter and observed it against the light, knowing what it was and formulating a hypothesis of the situation as multiple ideas crossed his mind. The addition of a second set of vials containing small portions of what he dubbed 'Blue Matter' by its color opened a larger spectrum of questions, but the initial conclusions were clear: the thunder storm was provoked by the use of the red matter and the man who shared appearance and name with Khan that was currently in their custody was not the same one in the Federation's custody.

The shuttle's logs showed an airlock had been recently opened and the scarce contents of the secure box of vials missed a couple of them and a larger container probably used to hold both vials in a single tube. If Spock's theory was correct, Khan used the larger tube to contain both examples of matter and used them somehow to create the thunderstorm that brought him. Spock was unsure if this meant the Khan currently in their custody was an alternative time line version of the one they knew or something similar, although that was most likely the case, judging by their previous experience with such phenomenon and the fact that Khan had an previous knowledge of some degree of the Enterprise's crew or whom he knew as such.

Even knowing this, Spock felt no less suspicions of the man. The impression of his encounter with the Khan he knew was still a sore point in his life of which he was constantly reminded when he shared words with Kirk. He concluded doctor McCoy felt the same, as he had expressed his distrust of the situation in various degrees. But the initial inquiry was the same: where did Khan came from and what dangers had he brought with him?

Spock noted how uncomfortable their Captain was with his so far short interactions with Khan, mostly because in a bizarre display of what they have previously seen, this Khan seemed to hold a deep sentiment of wariness, anger and other mixed emotions towards Kirk, but he also unconsciously responded to him, but the results had been mostly negative. The manacles Khan was wearing reacted to Kirk's touch as well as the collar around his neck; the same collar had a name tag with Kirk's name on it. Spock had seen something similar being use by the Orion slave traders and the implications obviously bothered Jim, who felt even worse when he unknowingly appeared to have shocked the prisoner into obedience and staying still due to a conditioned response.

The lack of information was affecting everyone, so they had to work faster in order to not be overwhelmed by questions. Unfortunately their main clue and source of information, Khan, remained reluctant to even look at them, much less relay details of his story. Against his better judgment, doctor McCoy suggested they worked on taking the manacles off his wrists to build a least some degree of thrust, Jim approved the suggestion and required Chekov and Scotty to see to the situation.

It was vital for them to have a clear picture of what exactly they were dealing with, because if the possibility of any threat coming to them existed, they had to be ready to confront it.

Spock closed the case holding the Red and Blue Matter to be taken to one of the Science Division labs for further analysis when his communicator went off.

"Scott to Spock."

"Spock here."

"We require yer input in the brig Mr. Spock, this here seems to be Vulcan tech."

"On my way."

Spock frowned as a thought passed his mind, connecting possible dots and events but left that in standby in favor getting to the brig.

\----------

"Ach, what kind of tech' is this, anyway?" Scotty tilted his head and made a face, gently turning Khan’s wrist to observe the manacle closely, "I ain't ever seen anything similar before and I tell ya, I've seen a lot of tech."

Khan felt uneasy with so many people hovering around him. Leonard muttering to himself about Khan's poor health state, a far cry from the McCoy Khan was used to. Scotty was helping Chekov and they were generally being very cooperative with each other and if Khan observed correctly they had a mentor-student relationship. Khan refrained from remembering the fate of the Chekov he used to know and did not give much thought to Scotty, he didn’t want to give much thought to Scotty, better leave bad memories behind.

"Aha!" Chekov made a happy sound and Khan closed his eyes and slowly exhaled through his nose, remained himself that he was not in his world, "Zis' is Wulcan technology, right?"

"Probably," Khan murmured and tilted his head to a side, "It was commissioned by—" he shut his mouth, making an annoyed expression, unsure of how to call the person he wanted to talk about, "The captain...yes, by the captain to a Vulcan."

It was only logical that if they were dealing with Vulcan technology, they ask a Vulcan for assistance, and being that the case and for what Khan have seen so far he should have expected whom was going to walk through that door, but the damage was anchored and the impression deeply rooted in him, so when Spock entered the brig, everything turned into chaos.

\----------

_He couldn’t breathe, everything hurt and such basic and simply action as to fill his lungs with air seemed too much of a task, an impossible doing that was beyond his capabilities as he lay on the floor struggling to regain some strength in his broken and bleeding body._

_His eyes adverted to the rigid figure of the Vulcan observing him as others continue beating him, the calculating glance giving away nothing to those who didn't know what to look for. Khan was not fooled; he knew the Vulcan was waiting for something to happen, something that appeared to be close, as the continued interest in the Vulcan's eyes grew greater._

_The moment came when he tried to stand again, only for his knees to give out under him. He crumbled down in a pool of his own blood and felt consciousness slipping away from him. Between the blurry shapes and the sounds that made no sense, the Vulcan was suddenly crouching before him, holding a pair of manacles and reaching for his wrists. He fought back, he resisted and cursed, but his efforts went ignored and dismissed._

_He felt the manacles close around his wrist and what was left of his strength evaporated, he felt drained and trapped, even more than before. He looked up, rage and hatred in his eyes for the man that had forced such instrument of slavery on him, but he got no reaction from the Vulcan._

_"It's done, Captain." The voice was monotone as always, Khan couldn't understand why it disgusted him so much._

_"Good job Spock," Kirk approached them and touched the manacles, activating the sequence that would allow him to manipulate them as he pleased. He forced Khan's wrists behind his back as he kneeled over him, on knee planted against Khan's lower back and the other on the floor, "It seem they work perfectly, I will keep testing them anyway, better not take risks."_

_"I assure you Captain, you will find they work according to your request," Spock pointed out, looking at Khan on the floor, "The only inconvenience is the draining process, as its results may vary."_

_"You said we had to get him into this state to set the bar of the process," Kirk pressed his knee against Khan's back with more force, making him grunt, "I want him to be like this whenever I want."_

_"I can work on a complementary device to enhance the results," Suggested Spock and a grin adorned his lips, "Perhaps a collar..."_

_"I like how you think," Kirk sat on Khan's back and traced his fingers over his face in an almost gently gesture, only to fist his hair a second later. Khan hissed in discomfort but refused to give any other reaction, "Yes, I like it. I want one."_

_"Thank you captain, I will see it done."_

_"In the meantime..." Kirk lowered himself, practically laying atop of Khan and licked his cheek in a mockery of a kiss, "You and I will have some fun, pet."_

\----------

"Well, now we can be sure there's something both Khans have in common," McCoy said as he cleaned a bleeding gash from Spock's eyebrow, "Both of them can't stand your guts."

"I do not appreciate your attempt at humor, doctor."

"My point stands." If McCoy pressed a little harder than necessary while cleaning his split lip, Spock did not say it, he was too focused in observing Khan, who laid in the biobed across him, deeply sedated.

"His condition?"

Bones pursed his lip as he ditched another cotton stained in green blood and looked over his shoulder at Khan, observing the monitors and back to Spock, "You cracked three of his ribs and dislocated his shoulder but I already set it back into place, he's going to be in pain but will recuperate, eventually… probably, I'm still monitoring if his blood cells regenerate like the ones from the Khan we already know."

"I do not think so," Spock narrowed his eyes, "It did not take as much effort as before to take him down."

"He's not in his top condition," Bones pointed out, "If said condition is the same as the Khan I already have on file, you get the drill."

"I think..." Spock got off the bed and walked towards Khan, Bones rolled his eyes and let him do it, knowing sometimes Spock could be as stubborn as Jim when his health was related, he paid attention to the Vulcan circling his other patient's biobed, however, not wanting a fight in med-bay and willing to sedate Spock if necessary to prevent that, he had no trouble sedating Khan to the next dimension to break the previous fight after all.

"What?"

Spock touched the manacles, frowning. "This may be the reason his regenerative readings do not match that of the Khan we know."

"Well, Chekov mentioned these things were Vulcan technology, so they called you..." Bones said evenly, an idea already forming in his mind, he wasn't particularly comfortable with it but voiced it anyway, "And he just lost it when he saw you..."

"You think I made them," it was not an accusation, Spock thought about it too, though it was the doctor who voiced it, "Hence his reaction."

"Well, not you _you_ , but someone who looks like you to him," Bones clarified, "Apparently he knows a lot of us or the versions of us from whatever he is from, if your theory of him being from another world is correct."

"Most likely is," Spock turned around, thinking, "We found some evidence inside the shuttle that reinforces such theory..."

Bones walked to him and placed a butterfly strip on Spock's eyebrow not too gently, "I'll keep him under, go and do whatever research you need to."

"Thank you, doctor."

Leonard nodded absentmindedly as Spock left the med-bay, his attention focused in the readings the scans were giving him of Khan's condition. He made some notes in his PADD under Khan's file, comparing the vitals and lectures with those of the Khan he knew, finding notable differences.

He ordered Khan to be put on fluids as they kept him sedate and tapped the PADD with his fingers, his annoyance for the man in question and whatever bad memories his resemblance with the one in cryostasis did not stop him from wondering what were the living conditions of his current patient.

"When was the last time you slept, for God's sake?" Bones murmured and continued his examination.

\----------

_"You should be grateful," Kirk whispered in his ear, "Isn't being mine much better than being locked in a cold box?"_

_Khan shook his head in defiance and was backhanded for his effort, "I am not yours—"_

_"You are," Kirk countered quickly, Khan could feel his smirk against his neck, "The Empire gave you to me, you're my pet and let's be honest, without me you are nothing."_

_"You are wrong—"_

_"You are an experiment, a successful one, but experiment nonetheless," Kirk scrapped his teeth over his earlobe, sending a shudder down his spine, "Commissioned by those who built our early Empire... owned by those who created you and preserved for future use when your purpose was served, and now... now you're mine, without me you have no voice, nowhere to stand, if not for me, you would be nothing more than an obsolete weapon stored in a warehouse."_

_He closed his eyes and turned his head when Kirk aimed to kiss his lips, ignoring the chuckle from the captain and the soft unwanted touches._

_I'm not a weapon, I'm not an object, I belong to no one... I don't..._

_The mantra repeated itself in his head, sometimes drowned by the voices of doubt in his head and the frequently echoing laughter of his slaver._

_"You're mine."_

_He wanted to scream and deny the claim, but he couldn't find his voice._

\----------

The smell of antiseptic was somehow familiar but did little to ease his confusion. He didn't recognize the sounds around him, leaving him with little to figure out where he was. Before opening his eyes he recalled his last conscious memory and gasped.

Spock, Kirk's second in command. He remembered the Vulcan coming towards him and his emotions got the best of him. Khan cursed himself for acting out of instinct instead of thinking. He lifted his right hand and pressed his fingers against his eyes, feeling a headache echoing behind them.

He wasn't tied down.

Khan snapped his eyes open and looked around while sitting up on the biobed. He was in a semi-private section of the med-bay, the curtains drawn and no one was over him just yet. The manacles around his wrist were not as tight as before and he fondly recalled Chekov being able to lower the pressure in them, it left enough space for the raw skin underneath them to be treated and bandaged. His ribs ached and his shoulder as well. Khan blinked several times, finally recalling where he was.

He was in a world not his own, but with people who looked exactly the same yet were different. Some of those differences were subtle, some very obvious. Khan grimaced when recalling Chekov; his presence was the main reason he was open to the idea of being in another universe. Evidently, Chekov was fine in this place, which was good, though it didn't make any easier seeing him.

His eyes stayed fixed on the bandages under the manacles for a long time and he didn't look up when the curtain was drawn and doctor McCoy entered the space and waved his hand in front of his face to get his attention.

"So, how do you feel?" McCoy asked with a pleased expression on his face, "I got your shoulder back in place and your ribs are healing nicely, well... something like that."

Khan palmed his torso, nodding, "I'm fine."

"You will have to tell me what you consider 'fine' so I can set a bar here, because I think you're not fine," He shrugged, "You're still dehydrated, so you probably have a headache, am I right?" Khan glared at him, "I'll take that as a yes." He turned around and came back with a large bottle of water, "Take it slowly."

Khan took the bottle, noticing it was sealed and looked between the doctor and the bottle a few times, making Bones raise and eyebrow.

"What?"

"It is nothing," He opened the bottle and took a few sips as the doctor continued his checkup. He didn't want to engage in conversation more than necessary but he felt responsible for his blinded actions early on, "I wish to apologize for my behavior towards Mr. Spock."

The doctor chuckled, "You did a number on his face but he will get over it, he's more concerned with the lack of information of where you came from than your tantrum, honestly."

"I see..."

"So, the Spock you know, you obviously don't like him," Bones gave him an expecting glance, "Wanna share the reason with the class?"

Khan was looking at him with such mistrust it was having an effect on him. Now he got the comment Jim made about this Khan's gaze making him twitchy.

"Where I come from Mr. Spock, your Captain, yourself... most of the Enterprise's crew I would dare to say, is drastically different and my experiences with them are...bitter."

Leonard lowered the chart, placing it aside. His expression was serious and calculating, looking at his patient up and down, reading in his silence what he was not saying. His eyes stopped over the collar around his neck and the silver tag hanging from it.

"You're his slave, aren't you? Jim's..." He looked conflicted with his conclusion and even more so when Khan nodded without sparing him a glance, "Goddamn it..."

Unconsciously, Khan ran his fingers over the silver tag.

\----------

_If he had any strength left, it was drained when the collar was snapped shut. Kirk ran his fingers all over the collar, sealing his genetic code in it and to a final touch attached a silver tag with his name on it so the entire goddamn universe would know who Khan belongs to. Apart from the manacles and the collar, he was nude and the captain was not, making very clear what was about to happen. Khan snarled at him, firmly pushing the other man away from him, but Kirk just smiled down at him and avoided his awkward struggles. Khan noted his superior strength was simply not there and that made him panic for a moment._

_"Behave."_

_Kirk tapped the collar and pain coursed through Khan's whole body; he arched his back instinctively and fisted the sheets, tossing his head to a side, waiting for the wave of pain to pass as Kirk laid beside him, running his fingers through his hair as if was not his doing._

_Khan panted, it felt far too long when the pain finally started to lessen, and Kirk continued to kiss his lips, cheeks and eyes no matter how much Khan tried to push him away with what was left of his suppressed strength._

_"Don't!"_

_"Shss, shss, it's ok..." Kirk smirked against his ear, his hands grabbing him around the waist and tangling their legs, rubbing his crotch against Khan's, his intent fully clear. With his other hand he touched the collar around Khan's neck, "It fits you perfectly."_

_He didn't give Khan the chance to speak; instead he forced Khan onto his belly and kneeled between his legs, grabbing his wrist and activating the manacles to hold them together behind his back. Khan gritted his teeth in anger, wanting the forced weakness to disappear so he could fight back, not wanting to feel Kirk's hands exploring his body, touching his inner tights and humming in approbation._

_Fingers coated in something cold teased his entrance and Khan pressed his face against the mattress. Kirk slipped two fingers inside him and kissed his lower back._

_"Such a good pet, but..." Khan hissed when a third finger was added and blocked the sound of Kirk's chuckle, "You have to behave."_

_Four fingers and a deep shove and Khan grunted in discomfort, feeling his body being stretch forcefully. Kirk made him bend his leg to get a better access and continue to fuck him with his fingers, changing his pace at random._

_"Come on Khan, talk to me pet." Khan refused to acknowledge him and got a painful shove for his audacity, "Oh? Are my fingers not enough? Of course... Should've known."_

_Taking his fingers out, Kirk firmly grabbed Khan's bent knee to keep him in that position as he aligned himself and thrust in, slowly filling his unwilling partner until Khan was panting and squirming under him, face firmly pressed against the mattress and teeth clenched together so hard it hurt, but that pain was nothing compared with the sensation of being forced open. Kirk was touching him in between too rough and almost gently and it made him sick. Those lips where on him again, kissing, biting and marking him while the man who wanted to own him whispered to him sweet false words._

_He screamed when out of nowhere Kirk bit down, hard, on his neck, breaking the skin, puncturing the flesh and making him bleed. Kirk changed the angle of his thrusts and Khan gasped._

_"Found it..." Kirk said sweetly and continued to press against that spot, making Khan moan and kick his feet. Kirk pressed his bent knee against the mattress more firmly, feeling close to reach his peak. He pressed his face against Khan's neck and his entire body shuddered. Khan felt Kirk find his release inside him and felt disgusted as he was being filled up with his slaver's seed._

_"You look so good like this," He whispered in Khan's, low and almost breathless, "Marked, collared, face down with my cock in you... so damn good."_

_"I hate you..."_

_Kirk kissed the corner of his lips and nuzzled his face, petting his belly, "Doesn't change the fact that you're mine."_

_Khan cursed him, because he was right._

\----------

Jim ran several options in his head trying to find the most reasonable of what exactly should he do with their unexpected guest. They were far away from Earth, turning back and setting course would take a long time, so he was leaving that as the last option. He was considering going to the nearest planet with a Starfleet station, but he wasn't sure if leaving Khan there to wait for the next Starfleet cargo to come and pick him was a good idea. They found him adrift in space, so technically they were directly responsible until they could hand over custody to another officer.

And of course there was the fact that this Khan was not The Khan. This man was not the one that did so much damage to Starfleet and literally made him walk to his death, no matter if it was temporary.

Jim sighed, feeling a headache coming. The last report was that Khan attacked Spock and they ended up sedating the augment to break the fight. Now Spock was far more interested in the cargo of red and blue matter they found in the Shuttle and the manacles design that in their fight, even if he was walking around with a butterfly strip on his eyebrow and a split lip, not to mention the bruised cheek. He was also interested in answers so he suggested making Khan more aware of where he was, hoping to gain some information in return from him. He gave Jim a PADD with basic non-classified information and Jim agreed to go along with it, hoping it proved to work in their favor.

Khan was now in med-bay and Bones reported everything was fine but Jim wanted to see for himself so at the end of the shift that was exactly what he did.

"—Not going to hurt you, the Hippocratic Oath is not a bunch of empty words, you know?" Bones sounded far more patiently than he looked.

"It's not that," Jim heard Khan say. "If you try to take it off without the key, it's going to harm me."

"How does it work, anyway?"

"I do not know," Khan was thumbing the collar and looking towards the ceiling while Bones exanimated it closely, "He never explained and never took it off."

"Shit man, how long have you been wearing that thing?" Bones took a pen light and gently eased his fingers in the space between the collar and Khan's neck, "I need the treat the skin underneath."

"Far too long."

"What's going on?" Jim asked while approaching and Khan... Khan jumped and if not for Bones he would have fallen off the bed. Jim was conflicted about his reaction, "Bones?"

"Ah, they couldn't take these things off," Bones motioned to the manacles and the collar, "But I was able to treat the skin of his wrist, so that's progress."

"Hey," Jim didn't know if he should smile or not, but he had to talk to Khan and the man was... not looking at him. He was actually trying very hard to not look at him, "Khan."

Khan twitched and slowly lifted his eyes to look at him but didn't say a word. Bones was looking a little anxious about the whole thing.

"Jim..." The MCO warned softly, and Jim nodded but still approached.

"I need some answers," Jim closed his eyes and ignored Leonard's angry expression, "We found some things in the shuttle you came in and now we need you to talk, starting with that name... Terran Empire."

Khan grimaced, "It's the government, an interstellar one."

"We don't have such a thing," Jim came closer and he noticed how Khan strongly gripped the edges of the biobed he was sitting on to not move, "Here, look at this."

Jim handed him the PADD Spock gave him, waiting as Khan eyed him with that mistrust that made Jim feel uncomfortable and exasperate, "Just take it."

Khan's hand twitched and he was taking the PADD from Jim the second the captain finished talking. Jim frowned when Khan cursed himself under his breath and Bones gave the augmented a look very close to pity but quickly concealed, probably to avoid Khan noticing it.

Khan took a deep breath and exhaled, keeping his eyes closed for a moment. Back in control of his emotions, he ran his fingers over the PADD and read the initial topic: The United Federation of Planets. Early in his lecture, a frown adorned Khan's face and stayed there for far too long in Jim's opinion, he mouthed things like _liberty_ and _equality_ rolling his eyes and muttering the words _of course_ , Jim could easily tell he was not impressed.

He stopped reading, and just stared at the PADD for a long moment.

"Your Federation, at first sight, looks like the antithesis of the Terran Empire," He was speaking in a very low voice and Jim refrained from asking him to speak higher in favor of just letting him speak, "The Empire subjugates and its Starfleet runs not in pursue of knowledge, but power."

Jim was about the take the PADD when Bones shook his head and did it himself. Khan let him do it and was not as twitchy as before in his presence, but he was still radiating mistrust and even anger. Bones was sure that if there was a Leonard McCoy in Khan's universe they did not get along, to put it nicely.

"That's awful," Jim couldn't help but be skeptical at the information, fearing the foreshadowing of a military Starfleet. He narrowed his eyes in suspicions, "And what about you? Where do you stand within that Empire?"

Khan lowered his eyes, his shoulders slump and head bowed. He mumbled something Jim didn't heard, so he got closer, wincing when Khan flinched.

"Sorry, I didn't quite catch that, you were saying?"

"Don't make me say it," he repeated and as much as it bothered him, Jim couldn't let it pass.

"Sorry, but the version of yourself of this universe is not exactly trustworthy."

Khan's whole frame was trembling as his breath hitched and he curled even more into himself. Bones was hovering over him with a tricorder already, frowning. Jim sighed, thinking the cause much too troublesome and immediately regretting it when Khan finally spoke.

"I am a slave of the Terran Empire, a tool for my master to do as he pleases. I was born as a slave, engineered as one and I will die as such."

Jim was taken aback by this but Bones shoved him aside before he could speak again, "Heart rate elevated, blood pressure high... I need oxygen here!"

Jim stared at the whole scene, his eyes fixed in the silver tag hanging from Khan's collar and paled as the image formed in his head; his own self over Khan. He covered his mouth with his hand feeling dizzy, and while the medical staff did their job, he walked away.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> BotanyCameos was awesome again and helped me out with the revision of this chapter, thank you darling!
> 
> Same warnings of last chapter and the tags of the story overall.

Jim observed the security feed from the section Khan was being kept in med-bay, fully aware of how creepy he appeared by doing so, but he couldn't help it. The words Khan said about his status in the Terran Empire, his constant state of paranoia and involuntary reactions were driving Jim to the edge. He was not naïve, at least not that much. He could put two and two together and because of that, he concluded that if Khan's status as a slave and the collar he was wearing had any relation, and they most likely did, Jim's name was in that silver tag for an obvious reason. 

He tugged at his hair and then covered his face with his hands as the life feed continued and Khan remained in an induced sleep. Jim took a deep breath and stayed very still for several minutes, thinking. 

There was a signal from outside the ready room, alerting an incoming person before the door slide open and Spock entered, Jim didn't even look at him or let him talk before letting out the thought that was saturating his mind. 

"We need to take that collar off." 

"Good evening, Captain," Spock tilted his head to a side, looking between the live feed and Jim, who was still covering his face with his hands, "I assume further interaction with Khan was not successful." 

Jim rested his back fully on the chair he was sitting on and folded his hands against his lap, sighing. "He told me about the Terran Empire and his status in it... then I sent him into a panic attack by accident." 

"Panic attack?" 

"I asked him about his status in this empire and... it didn't go well," Jim opened his eyes to look at Spock, "I might have made him relive something bad." 

Spock sat on the chair across the desk and observed the live feed himself for a few moment, not finding it particularly informative, as Khan was just laying there sleeping, "Did he said anything relevant regarding this empire?" 

Jim rolled his eyes; trust Spock to focus into the more technical details, "Yes, he said it was at first glance the antithesis of the Federation. He also mentioned the empire's Starfleet is entirely militarized and that their primary objective of to conquer, not explore." 

"Antithesis is an interesting choice of description," Spock placed the PADD he was carrying with him over the desk, "Most accurate, for what the combined efforts of the Engineer and Science teams were able to find in the shuttle's structure and systems." 

The shuttle had logs of weapons shipment to several ships, mainly the ISS Enterprise. Unfortunately, beyond information regarding the shuttle and its logs of transportation, there was no more information. Jim noticed that the container with red and blue matter Spock and the Science Division team had been analyzing was not listed among the cargo. 

"That vials, the ones you were researching, there's nothing about them here." 

"I assume Khan took the container with him into the shuttle, hence the reason it's not among the cargo list," Spock touched the PADD to change the section for the one of the preliminary results on the matter vials, "The blue matter is also artificially created, same as the red matter, but its exact purpose remains unknown, we are working on that." 

"That's... That's nice." 

"You are distracted," Spock pointed out and turned off the PADD, giving his captain a level look, expecting him to talk. 

"It's Khan, I... we really need to take that collar off, it's freaking me out," Jim hissed and tugged at his hair again, ignoring Spock's intrigued look, "I... I can't leave it like that... it's not fair to him." 

"We do not know much about him and our priority is the security of others rather than Khan's emotional state," the thought was direct and truth, but still felt heartless. 

"We can't just throw him in the brig and pretend nothing's wrong with him!" 

"Doctor McCoy is taking care of his physical health," He rezoned but the glare he received in return told him it was not what Jim wanted to hear, "Captain, I do not recommend further engagement with the prisoner." 

"Why is he our prisoner Spock, what did he do?" Jim hissed, pinching the bridge of his nose, "Being in a severely damaged shuttle near our location?" 

Spock closed his eyes. Khan had done nothing and he was not to blame for his counterpart's actions. His aggressive reactions had been upon being threatened by them from the beginning and through confusion on his part, as Khan mistook them for the people he knew that shared appearance with them in a similar universe to their own. So in conclusion and by logic, Khan was not their prisoner, for there was no crime committed. 

"You are right captain; Khan – this Khan – has not committed any transgression against us. In a better assessment of the situation I would say his status to us is ambiguous. However, precautions must be taken." 

"You're just mad because he punched you in the face," Jim motioned towards him with an amused grin, "A good reason, don't get me wrong, I would be wary too." 

"He tried to strangle you," Spock reminded him, his tone calm and collected but Jim could swear he was laughing at him for some reason. 

"I'm pretty sure he was not expecting to actually be able to hurt me," Jim frowned, "That tipped him off, it seriously took him off guard..." His gaze returned to the live feed, finding little to no change in it, Khan had just moved to lay on his side instead of his back and a nurse was hovering near the area and the security guards looking over him. 

"If you insist in further contact with our... unexpected guest," Spock decided to change the term, "I will still insist in precautions, we have little to no knowledge of Khan's story, except that he was running away from his universe's version of the Enterprise." 

"I'm pretty sure the slave status has to do something to do with that," Jim looked at Spock with some irritation, "99.9% sure." 

"It is a possible reason—" 

"Spock..." 

His second in command closed his eyes for a moment, dropping formalities before speaking, "You died Jim, and he shares the face of the man that drove you to that fate." 

Jim winced, feeling guilty all over again. Still, it gave him a better understanding of why Spock was so reluctant of acknowledging the elephant in the room. In Khan he was not seeing a man in desperate need of help, but the remembrance of the man who committed a great crime against Earth and made it personal when Jim climbed into that radioactive chamber. 

"Spock I... I'm sorry." 

"I understand I must be objective," Spock stood up, taking the PADD from the desk, "But it is taking me more than expected, as I am emotionally compromised." 

"No, it's fine, I just..." 

"You are right Jim," Spock quickly mended, not wanting to add more inner conflict into Jim's already messed thoughts, "Khan requires help and we might not be the best option to provide it, but we are the only one, for the moment." 

Spock nodded to himself and turned around to leave, and Jim called for him, "Hey Spock!" 

"Yes captain?" 

"Thank you," Jim said softly. "And I'm sorry for worrying you guys so much." 

"You wouldn't be you otherwise," Spock smiled, "Be carefully Jim." 

"I will." 

Spock nodded and left the room, wanting to be with Nyota for the rest of the night cycle, knowing his friend was safe and sound even when the ghost of his almost permanent fate was around them. 

\---------- 

_He stood before the mirror, his body bare except for the marks of ownership forced on him; the manacles around his wrist, the collar on his neck. Khan stared at the silver tag hanging from the collar, not wanting to look at the man behind him._

_"You're such a pretty thing," Kirk whispered in his ear, running his hands possibly all over his body, "And you look even better with the mark of my love on you."_

_Khan choked at the word, because there was no way Kirk honestly wanted him to believe all the things he did to him could be compare to love. It was such a delusional thought it made him sick._

_Kirk heard his choked sound and disliked the reaction, pouting at his reflection in the mirror, "How rude of you, pet."_

_There was a pat on the collar and Khan feel to his knees as the pain coursed across his body, decreasing a moment later. Kirk took advantage of the disoriented state the punishment left him to roughly grab him by the chin and force him mouth open._

_"Ah, time to compensate me."_

_Khan heard the zip of Kirk pants, forcing the bile threatening to rise from the back of his throat and kept his mouth open as the other man made him suck him off. Khan couldn't decide what affected him the most, if the way Kirk fucked his mouth of the way the pretended it to be gentle by touching his face with delicacy and murmuring sweet empty words._

_He sucked Kirk off because the alternative was too painful, but even knowing that, the shame shimmered in him as he swallowed Kirk's seed and felt disgusted at being called a good pet for doing so. Kirk kissed his swollen lips, tasting himself in Khan's mouth and chuckled in amusement while Khan tried to keep his mind detached of the moment and failed._

_Kirk kissed his cheek sweetly and Khan whimpered._  

\---------- 

Khan was awake but he had no desire to move, instead he observed behind partially closed eyelids as the people in the Delta Shift in the med-bay fulfilled their duties. He was partially awake when the Delta Shift finished and his security guards and the nurses watching over him came to do see if anything had changed. Now he was just laying there, observing the med-bay. 

It was different; he could clearly see that now. This med-bay was designed to support the duties of the medical staff to help those who required medical attention, not... hurt them. Khan closed his eyes and unconsciously moved his legs to curl into himself a little, stopping before it appeared he had moved too much. He opened his eyes, looking at the bandages under around his left wrist, under the manacle that was loosened up a bit thanks to Pavel and Scotty. 

He slid the fingers of his right hand over the surface of the biobed, breathing softly to remain calm; he couldn't help but feel uneasy in the med-bay, even when it clearly was not the same as the ISS Enterprise. The lack of torture instruments proved that much, yet the similarities were present and that made things difficult. 

Khan closed his eyes again, trying to relax and hopefully get some sleep. 

"Hey, you really can't be here!" Leonard's urgent whisper barely reached Khan, the man was starting to finally fall sleep on his own. 

"You can't seriously expect me to just hide in Engineering and pretend nothing is happening!" A female voice urged in a low voice, "The weapons in the shuttle are far too dangerous and we need the correct specs! I'm sorry about the hour and I understand I'm being pushy but—" 

"He's asleep, damn it!" Leonard grunted, "It's too damn early for this, sweetheart. And you need permission from the captain to be anywhere near that man." 

Khan frowned in his half sleep state and blinked, he knew that voice. He focused his vision and directly in his line of vision was Carol Marcus angrily whispering with Leonard about protocol and other things Khan didn't quiet catch. 

"What's going on here?" Khan's eyes widened as Jim entered med-bay, looking between Carol and Leonard, folding his arms across his chest, "Doctor Marcus?" 

"Captain, we seriously can't wait much longer, besides the red and blue matter there are other high functional weapons that are a danger to us if we don't know the proper way to handle them, I really don't want to bother him but..." Carol gripped the PADD in her hands, "I suspect part of the cargo are subspace warheads." 

"What's with this guy and dangerous advance weapons?" Leonard murmured angrily, shaking his head while Jim looked very serious. 

Khan slowly got up and got down the biobed silently. He knew beforehand that about the subspace warheads in the cargo of the small ship, but he didn't consider them to be the right weapon to use, especially not against the ISS Enterprise. He brought the red and blue matter because it was unstable but it gave results and now they were talking about him and his mast— the captain was making a strange expression and he had to get away, the sooner the better, but of course things never go his way. 

"Sir, your patient is awake," said one of the guards and Khan froze and cursed his stupidity because of course they were watching him, how on the galaxy did he forget that, he couldn't tell. 

Jim immediately looked at him and Khan averted his eyes and turned around, waiting to be anywhere but there. 

"Hey, stop right—! Oh shit—" 

The shock of pain started at the base of Khan's skull and down his spine, coursing cross his nervous system and overwhelming it quickly, sending him to the ground in a wave of agony. Khan gasped, feeling his eyes watering. He wanted to stay still, knowing it was the best way to deal with the pain. There was a voice in his mind wondering what he did wrong this time and another one screaming that he did nothing, but his head hurt too much to make proper context of his own inner argument. 

As quickly as it came, the source of the pain stopped. His nervous system was still overwhelmed by the wave and he was still in pain, but it was decreasing. Khan blinked several times to clear his vision, ignoring the moisture in his eyes and forcing his vision to focus. He was on the floor of the med-bay; someone was holding him and touching his neck over the collar. He looked up and found Jim looking down at him, his hands around Khan's throat, almost afraid. He looked so concerned and troubled and Khan couldn’t understand why. 

"I'm so sorry," Jim said softly, "I... I didn't mean to do that." 

Khan noted he was practically on Jim's lap, unsure of how he got there. For the position it looked as if Jim had moved him that way to get his hands around the collar to deactivate it, it seemed logical, but Khan was still unsure over the action. The Kirk he knew would not act that like this and any kindness was just a fake statement to make him hurt. It was still too soon and he wanted to get away from the man who looked so much like Kirk but he was afraid to move and it deeply pained him to admit that. 

Jim's hands were still around his throat, touching the collar gently while Bones did a new examination, apparently disliking what the readings were telling him. Khan closed his eyes and pretended this was not affecting him. 

\---------- 

_Carol smiled to herself, running the comb across Khan's black locks over and over until she was satisfied. She moved around the chair Khan was sitting on and combed his hair back, tilting her head and biting her lip, not entirely satisfied with her work. Khan was not looking at her, he kept his eyes cast down on the ground, briefly closing them when Carol reached to comb a lock out of the rest and let if fall over the right side of his face._

_"There, much better," Carol placed the comb down and touched his face, Khan shuddered. "You should be more careful, you know how much the captain dislikes when you don't listen to him."_

_"Don't do this..."_

_"Khan, we have talked about this," Carol rolled her eyes. "James T. Kirk is your master."_

_"You said you would help me," he whispered, "When your father woke me—"_

_"And I did, didn't I? I was the one that let Kirk know you existed, and he took a liking to you immediately. It was not all fate that the Empire gave you to him as his fabulous prize, I told my father it was the right choice for you," She motioned around them, "This is better than the lab."_

_"I'm still a slave, Carol!" He pleaded, clenching his teeth and bowing his head, "I don't want this!"_

_"Well, I can't do anything about that Khan, you are an augment," She walked past him to get her kit and towards the door, "And beings like you are considered property of their masters."_

_Khan gripped the edged of the chair to hide how much his hands were trembling. Carol didn't turn back, though she looked unsure of Khan's reaction._

_"He's not my master..."_

_"He is, Khan." Carol whispered, "Sorry."_

_She punched the security sequence and opened the door. Behind it Kirk was resting against the opposite wall, waiting with a smirk on his face. He walked past Carol to enter the room, looking delighted._

_"Ah, you made my pet look all pretty again."_

_"My pleasure, Captain."_

_"You're dismissed."_

_"Sir."_

_Carol didn't turn back once she walked out the room, but she stayed in the hallway for far longer than Kirk liked. The door closed, Kirk walked before Khan and grabbed him by the chin, making him look up. Khan's eyes were resentful, Kirk liked that. He liked to extract every emotion out of him by sheer force and abuse; it was a game he never got tired of._

_"Such a pretty face, shame you need to be disciplined this much Khan, such a shame."_

_Khan's breath hitched when Kirk leaned to place a kiss on his head, trailing his fingers down his neck and over the collar, thumbing the silver tag, his lips trailing down over Khan's closed eyes, placing open mouth kisses all over his face._

_"S-Stop it..."_

_"Ah..." Kirk leaned over him, tugging at the collar. Khan felt his strength being drained already and his treacherous heart rabbiting against his chest, "Why would I stop if I don't want to?"_

_He roughly took Khan by the chin, making him look at him in the eye._

_"Please..." Khan hissed in a mixture of humiliation and anger, "Please."_

_"Hmmm..." Kirk looked as if he was considering and the minutes crawled in expectation before he took Khan by the collar and pushed him onto the bed, "No."_

_By the time Kirk was done with him, he started to wonder if his previous fate as a lab rat wasn't perhaps better._  

\---------- 

Khan sat on the edge of the biobed, his hands resting on the edges of the mattress. His back was bent forward and his head down, he was avoiding looking at anyone, especially Jim, who regardless of the obvious sentiment remained close, looking worried. 

"I choose that ship because it was small but powerful enough to take me and fight back other cruisers if necessary," Khan mumbled and every time Spock or Carol wanted to ask him to speak louder, Bones gave them a murderous glare, warning them to keep their distance. 

Leonard was as resentful of the events that lead to Jim's tragic fate – even if temporary. But the more he saw this Khan the more it because obvious this man was not their enemy. As a doctor he had to take care of his patients and this particular patient was proving to be a challenge.  

"Did you pick the weapons cargo yourself, Mr. Singh?" Spock asked politely but the reaction he got from Khan was just confusion. 

"Excuse me?" Khan looked up at him blinking, "What did you call me?" 

"Mr. Singh," Spock repeated patiently, concluding something was amiss when Khan frowned, "Is that not your name? Khan Noonien Singh?" 

"It's just Khan," He licked his lips, uncertain of what to say, "I think..." 

"Khan," Spock amended quickly, sharing a glance with Jim who nodded in approval, "Did you pick the weapons yourself?" 

"No," Khan eyed Carol for a moment before casting his eyes to the ground again, "Someone did it for me." 

"We need to know the full specs of the weapons," Carol said softly and patiently. "So we can handle them properly, is just for safety." 

"I can't remember them all but... they are in the logs surely, she always includes a log among the cargo. It has to be in the secondary compartment, the code to open is... ah..." Khan looked uncomfortable and Carol did her best to keep the atmosphere relaxed. 

"It's ok if you can't remember right now," She tapped her PADD, looking for options. "Maybe the Captain can break it." 

"Your mother's birthday," Khan murmured and Carol froze, "You m-may know it... U-Unless it's a different date here." 

"I will try..." Carol blinked several times, unsure of how to react. "Did I, I mean, the one you know as me told you?" 

"...Yes." 

"That's... why?" 

"Doctor Marcus," Spock interrupted, "I suggest we check the cargo bay and open that compartment, if the code is not correct, we may need to hack the system." 

"Y-Yes Mr. Spock, you're right," Carol coughed combed her hair with her fingers, "Thank you for your assistance Mr. Si— Khan." 

She looked conflicted and not entirely happy of leaving without all her questions answered but she left med-bay as instructed, looking over her shoulder a couple of times and hesitating in the hallway for a second before finally leaving. 

Spock nodded in a departing gesture and left the med-bay. 

"Hey, eyes up here," Bones tapped the biobed with a penlight, making Khan react and lift his head so he could pass the light over his eyes for the checkup. He looked over the monitor behind the biobed, making a face, "Your readings are still a mess and you need to eat." 

"I can help with that," Jim moved around Bones, looking anxious, "Yes?" 

"Well..." Bones knew Jim felt guilty about striking Khan with a punishment again because he had no idea how the collar reacted to his voice, at least not how exactly it worked and he was trying to make amends, "Yes, but have something brought here, I don't want him to leave med-bay just yet." 

"Sure." Khan didn't look so happy about it, but did not said a word and that alone made Jim feel guilty all over again, "Ah... what would you like to eat?" 

Khan was avoiding eye contact with him and generally looking too anxious, it said things about the version of James T. Kirk he knew that made Jim feel sick. 

When the silence because too heavy for them both, Bones come to the rescue with a PADD for Jim, "Chose something from the list there, he should stick with something light for the moment." 

"Ah, ok..." 

Bones draw the curtain, leaving them in the semi-private area they arranged for Khan in the med-bay, ignoring Jim's panicked expression at being left alone with the highly unstable person he just unintentionally hurt. 

Khan fidgeted in the bed as Jim stood beside him, placing the order for Khan and something for himself. Now there was nothing more than wait and the silence was making it very stressful. 

"I mean it you know," Jim decided to say something and he hoped this was the right thing, "I didn't mean to hurt you." 

"It was an accident," Khan answered softly, still not looking at him. 

"It doesn't make it ok," Jim leaned against the biobed, leaving a few inches between him and Khan, who immediately tensed but when Jim did nothing more, started to relax a little. 

Khan lifted his head and with some uncertainty searched for Jim's eyes. There was sincerity and regret, something he was not used to see in those eyes, he also noted that made them look different, even if the face was so alike. 

"I don't want to hurt you again," the blonde eyed the collar and then back at Khan, "I don't know what I'm doing wrong." 

"It reacts to your voice and touch," Khan's hand immediately went to the silver tag, holding it in his hand, "By voice it reacts with orders and the way you, ehm... say things." 

"Emotion? It reacts if I put emotion in my voice?" 

"Is how you say it," Khan clarified. "If it sounds angry... it probably will hurt me, even if it's not a direct command to activate." 

"It also has a direct command?" Jim looked alarmed and Khan tried to not think too much about why it would alarm him. 

"Yes..." 

"Don't ever tell it to me, please, I don't want to activate it by mistake." 

That was far more than Khan expected and he numbly nodded at the request – the _request_ , not the _order_ , his brain remarked – Jim smiled happily at him in return, turning around to get the food he ordered as one of the staff came to deliver it. 

Khan let go of the silver tag as his head went around the thought of Jim smiling at him. The smile was different and it suited him, it wasn't disturbing and it didn't make him nervous. So unlike the one he was used to. 

Perhaps this man was indeed the antithesis of the one he used to call master. 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there! I want to thank you all for your comments, I'm very glad you are linking this story. Now, BotanyCameos was her awesome self again and helped me to beta-read this chapter, thank you!
> 
> Also warnings apply, explicit non-con in this one. 
> 
> Enjoy!

_Kirk looked unimpressed as he patted Khan's back constantly in a supposedly soothing gesture that was doing nothing to ease Khan's cough fit or soothe him, for the matter. There was blood dripping from his fingers as he covered his mouth and violently kept coughing, his other hand flat on the floor as he supported himself on his knees._

_"Goddamn it, I told you to not break my things!" Kirk hissed in anger, glaring at the CMO over his shoulder._

_"He will get over it, don't exaggerate you moron," McCoy shoot back and folded his arms over his chest, "If it's all the same to you, he did good."_

_"Oh, did he?"_

_"Yes," the doctor smirked, clearly amused, "He's right in the curve already."_

_Kirk didn't look too happy with that, "I can't play with him then."_

_"Give it a couple of days, I got the vaccine done, he's just repairing himself or whatever he was designed to do," McCoy rolled his eyes and leaned against the wall, "Very useful toy you got there."_

_"I told you last time to not overdo it, I like my things in one piece," Kirk got Khan to his feet and made him lay on the bed, Khan curled into himself to get away, snarling at Kirk. "Don't give me that attitude, pet."_

_"He's going to be a pain in the ass for a while," the doctor casually said, "But more than a side effect, that's just your toy's awful attitude."_

_"I let you play with him and you ruin all my efforts, damn you, Bones! He was behaving so well already..." Kirk fisted his hands, glaring back at Khan, who ignored him in return._

_"Oh please, don't pretend you don't love to 'train' him all over again, you bastard."_

_Khan felt anger as Kirk ran his fingers across his hair and even if he could not see him, he knew Kirk was smirking._

_"You know me so well, Sawbones."_

_"Damn right!"_

_Khan felt disgusted, but between the after effects of whatever McCoy infected him with and the unwanted attention he was getting from the man he clearly despised, Khan only wished to be left alone to at least heal in peace._

_That, of course, didn't happen._

\----------

Bones was grunting in annoyance as he checked Pavel's left hand. The young ensign hurt himself while helping down in Engineering; accidently activating the sequence of one of the weapons in Khan's shuttle and making it close over his fingers. Luckily for him Carol was able to deactivate the weapon as quickly as it activate and now the young man was here, getting lectured by Leonard.   

"You know better than this, kid." Chekov made a face of discomfort when Bones flexed his fingers, "I'm surprised Scotty let you near that cargo."

"I vas doing wery well, eet was a small mistake and eet von't happen again!" Pavel was pouting and Bones was too amused by it to say anything.

The doctor looked over his shoulder, noticing Khan in the corner of the section. He looked like a deer caught by the headlights when Bones greeted him with a "Oh, hi there! Are you feeling better?"

He would find it hilarious if he wasn't busy feeling too guilty about Khan's fear, "Tell me you already ate."

"Yes doctor..." Khan stepped closer, his arms behind his back, right hand uncomfortably holding the left forearm as he curiously looked at them, "Are you well, Andre— huh, I mean, Ensign?"

"He got his fingers caught in one of those fancy weapons in your shuttle," Bones motioned to his hand, making Chekov pout all over again. Leonard snorted and gave Khan an amused look, who looked at least vaguely more comfortable, far better than a few days ago.

Officially, Khan was McCoy's patient until further notice. After the last checkup Bones discovered that part of the reason Khan's health was so unlike the Khan in cryostasis was because this Khan had traces of dangerous diseases in his blood stream, and he had been dealing with the aftermath of one when he stumbled upon them. It was not required that he be put in quarantine, for the disease had already subsided, but Bones wanted to keep an eye on him until a full recovery.

Kirk gave the order after a long talk with Leonard, making Khan's status as a patient official but maintaining that anyone required his and Bone's explicit authorization to be anywhere near Khan. They expected Carol to bring her request in after the last events, so far she had refrained from doing so but Uhura told Jim she was seriously considering it, especially when Khan's words proved correct and the passcode for the secondary cargo had indeed been her mother's birthday, just as he said.

Khan had been talking with Leonard for the most part – if giving short answers could be considering talking, that's it – and ignoring everyone else, keeping to himself and reading from the material Spock had been giving him. This was the first time he approached someone out of nowhere.

"Eet's fine," said Chekov looking at Khan with a smile, "You can call me just Pavel if you want."

Khan shrugged, looking around for a moment, unsure of how to respond, "It might not be proper."

"Really, I don't mind," Chekov insisted, "Eet is alright if I talk with you for a wittle bit? Zere's some really interesting data in the logs I vould like to consult, if you don't mind."

Khan looked at Bones and it took the doctor a moment to understand this was Khan asking him. McCoy was not very comfortable with the idea of letting Khan out of med-bay and it was more for Khan's wellbeing than others, but if they wanted to achieve any kind of results they had to take risks and so far this was the first interaction Khan initiated with anybody. So he may not go out of med-bay just yet, but out of his eyesight for a while wouldn't hurt, hopefully.

"Yeah, it's fine," Bones allowed, "Bring whatever you need to my office, you two can talk there, sounds fair?"

"Yes!" Pavel smiled brightly, "Do you mind if Mr. Scott is also present?"

"It is fine by me," Khan nodded with a small smile on his face. Bones just hoped his interaction with Chekov and Scotty ended better than his initial encounter with Spock.

\----------

Jim tilted his head to a side, observing. Khan was at the other side of the room, looking at the space in deep thought, as if no one was around him. The day had passed uneventful and once Jim ended his shift he quickly went back to med-bay to check on their cross-dimensional guest. Bones motioned to the far side of the place, where Khan stood. He had changed his clothes, he was wearing grey pants and a white shirt, probably given to him by Bones.

His wrists were bandaged under the loosened manacles and so was the skin of his neck under the collar. He was letting bangs of hair fall over his face and generally looked skinnier but not as much beat up as when he arrived. There were marked differences between him and his counterpart, like the way he carried himself and the fact that he wouldn't make eye contact for more than two seconds with most people. Jim wished he could do something to make him feel a bit more comfortable, but he was walking on eggshells around Khan all the time; it was clear he had several issues with Jim's counterpart and with good reason, and Jim didn't want to make it worse.

Still, the blond felt responsible and because it was not like him to leave things aside, he was taking upon himself to a least try and do something.

"He looks better," Jim commented casually, Bones looked up from the PADD he was reading giving a heavy sigh, "What?"

"You have no idea how awkward it was to make him take a shower and change clothes, I swear he was expecting something far more sinister," the doctor cursed under his breath. "He looks calmer Jim, but... he really isn't fine."

"Bones?"

Jim's expression quickly morphed into concern as Bones looked from his notes to Khan and back, muttering about post-traumatic stress disorder and physiological issues. 

"Look... if this was remotely standard, I would tell you that he needs time and space besides a ton of counseling, but the thing is, I've never dealt with something like this before and, being very honest, I don't think he should be alone."

Jim looked at his friend in the eye, who in turn glanced at Khan. The augment had his hand against the glass of the window, while his other hand was thumbing the silver tag absentmindedly.

"But... isn't being left alone what someone freed of recent captivity would want?" He asked, speaking more to himself than anything else, voicing the question with a certain inner doubt that made him wonder if he should have keep it to himself. Bones dismissed the uncertainty in Jim's tone and answered anyway.

"I'm not sure if he knows how to be by himself," Bones tapped the PADD angrily and Jim could tell he was mad at the whole situation, perhaps because like Jim, he wished he could do more.

Jim noted how every time Khan was in deep thought, his hand immediately went for the silver tag. He wasn't even sure Khan had notice that himself, "That collar has to go."

"Yeah," Bones nodded, "The manacles too, I'm worried about the bones of his writs."

Jim ran his hands across his hair and pulled, "This is so fucked up."

Khan was still staring at space when Chekov arrived along Scotty to check on the manacles' structure again. He remained silent while they worked but lit up and started talking once Pavel coaxed him into it. Jim had a morbid curiosity to know what was crossing Khan's head, but at the same time was glad he had no idea.

\----------

_He knew the risks or at least he thought he knew them. It wasn't as if this was the first time someone tried to sabotage the ISS Enterprise, but this was the first time someone stepped so close to do it and Khan cursed himself because the risks were supposed to be his and his alone, but Chekov was holding a phaser when they found him and it was Chekov who shot Kirk down, taking the blame for the assassination attempt and getting dragged to the Agony Booth the second Kirk woke up._

_And now he was watching as Chekov screwed his eyes shut, placing both hands against the glass of the Agony Booth and pretending to be strong, not wanting to show how the pain was burning him inside out, clouding his senses and overwhelming his nervous system. Khan was all too familiar with the process, he had been in that despicable booth himself all too many times, he knew what Chekov was feeling and it was eating his conscience._

_"Stop this," He was on his knees, hands behind his back as the manacles held them there, painfully tighter than usual, "He didn't do it!"_

_"I clearly recall him shooting me," Kirk was on his feet besides him, arms folded and looking extremely annoyed._

_"He's taking the blame, you know that," Khan argued behind clenched teeth, "It was my doing, all my own!"_

_"Don't be stupid pet, of course I know it was you," Kirk roughly took him by the hair, forcing him to see as Pavel choked a scream and his legs gave out under him, sending him to his knees. "Pay attention, because you have to see this."_

_Kirk crouched behind him, holding his face in place, making him see directly at the scene before him. The younger man pressed his forehead against the glass, his shoulders were trembling and even the sound of the agony booth couldn't hide his sobs._

_"He's in so much pain he can't even scream," Kirk whispered into his ear, his tone all too satisfied, "And he is there because of you."_

_"Please, stop this!" Khan's eyes were so wide and fearful for Pavel's life, "I'm begging you!"_

_"Nah, he will fulfill his punishment and you..." Kirk tapped the collar and Khan screamed, falling into Kirks embrace in a wave of pain, "You will take yours and I will make sure it's even harder because I know he shot to take the blame, but it was your doing, Khan, and now you will pay for both, your audacity and his daring, and never forget this," Kirk pointed at the agony booth, where Chekov was not moving, "This is your fault!"_

_"A-Andre...!"_

_Kirk laughed at him, dragging him out of the room as the security officers remained in their posts and Pavel passed out cold on the agony booth floor. Khan feared the worse and Kirk was not making it any easier for him, if anything, his so called master enjoying making it worse._

_Khan made a grave mistake that day and Kirk made sure to never let him forget it._

\----------

Pavel was unsure of how to approach the subject, he wanted to be subtle, but so far they have talked about technology - and it was very interesting - but not what Jim asked him to do, if possible.

The captain was clear, if there was a chance to make Khan talk about his side of the story it would be great, if not then that was fine, they would try a different method. Pavel wanted to help, because it was obvious this Khan was different and somehow rather familiar with Chekov or at least at ease with him and considering the murderous glare he gave Scotty the first time he saw him, that was saying a lot.

"I'm sorry if I'm imposing on your dispozeetion but... I want to ask you something." He said when Scotty offered to get something to drink and left them by themselves in Bones' office "Can I?"

Khan frowned, "Yes, go ahead."

"You must know the _Me_ from your vorld vell enough, you called me 'Andre' earlier. Eet's a nickname that comes from my middle name, and not many people call me that," he pointed out, "Unless I'm very different zere."

"You're happier here," Khan said quickly. "Contrary or the others, there is not much difference between yourself and the version of you I'm used to, except that—"

"I'm happier?"

"Yes..."

Chekov bit his lower lip, looking curious about the topic, "How did you two meet? My other self and you."

Khan smiled, he really smiled and that was a bit weird to see but Pavel took it as a good sign, "I was injured and he helped me out."

"Zhat's good!"

"He had to turn me in after that, but he was kind and made the whole thing a lot easier for me."

"Zhat's... not so good."

Khan gave him a sympathetic smile, "Don't think over it too much, he had no choice. It was not worth the risk of the captain's wrath, but he still did something good for me and I appreciate it."

"So he helped you and then took you back to ehm... the keptin?"

"Yes," Khan looked serious all over again, "He gained his favor for that, although now I doubt that did him any good, in the end."

"Wha...?"

Khan looked distressed and covered his face with his hands, "He kept on helping me with little things and... it made a significant difference... but I did something that made the captain angry and he took the blame, he shouldn't have done that, I have not seen him since."

It was quick and Pavel was not sure why he did it, but suddenly he was on his feet and gave Khan a hug, the other man was shaking so badly he melted into it and closed his eyes.

"It wasn't your fault."

"But it was... it really was."

"No, it wasn't."

Khan just shook his head, not entirely convinced but feeling slightly better.

\----------

_"Oh Khan..." The tone was filled with a fake pity it made his stomach roll, "I taught you better than this... you should know by know that this behavior is unacceptable."_

_Kirk's fingers lightly touched his jaw and traveled down his chin to lift his head, making Khan look him in the eye. A grin adorned the Captain's face and there was an unsavory feeling linked to it for Khan. He showed defiance by moving his head away from Kirk's touch and was backhanded in return. Kirk was still smiling down at him and continued to do so as he yanked Khan from the floor by his hair and pushed him against the table._

_"You're forgetting your place, pet."_

_"I'm not yo—"_

_Kirk smashed the augment's face against the table so hard Khan saw colors dancing in his vision and when he tried to lift his head, the captain repeated the gesture. Kirk touched the manacles holding his arms behind his back to make them separate and change them to be magnetized to the table instead. He tried to lift his hands, even knowing the gesture was futile, and got no results other than hurting his already raw wrists._

_Khan felt Kirk move behind him pushing his shirt up and his trousers down. His so-called master traced his fingers down his back slowly in a mockery of a loving gesture._

_"All mine," Kirk scrapped his nails in the sensitive flesh of Khan's inner thighs and chuckled when the augment refused to react, "You're making it worse for yourself."_

_"I don't care."_

_"But I know you do," Kirk pushed his knees apart and Khan took the opportunity to lift his upper body in an effort to get Kirk off him, only for the collar around his neck to send a powerful shock through his body._

_He screamed, screwing his eyes shut and falling over the table, pressing the side of his face against it. Kirk carefully brushed a few strands of hair off Khan's face, smiling down at him with satisfaction, as Khan was not getting up. He walked away from him for a moment and came back with a few objects and arranged them over the table, directly in Khan's line of sight._

_"I got you a few toys," Kirk tapped his index finger over a large dildo and lowered his head to look at Khan in the eye, "It's a good time to try them out, don't you think?"_

_"You bast—"_

_Kirk forced Khan's head up, crushing his lips against the Khan's in an aggressive kiss, biting sucking and scrapping his teeth until he forced his tongue into Khan's mouth and bit down hard on his lip, before pushing his head against the table again._

_"Hush now," He petted his head and took the toy, moving behind Khan to spread his cheeks and shove it inside him. Khan hissed as the hard objet was pushed inside him, dry and unprepared, inch by inch filling him in an uncomfortable fullness. He pressed his forehead against the table and gritted his teeth as the toy was pushed all the way in only to gasp and whimper once it was turned on. Kirk kept petting his head, making the whole thing even more humiliating._

_"There's a good boy." Khan closed his eyes and tried to erase the image of Kirk looking down at him with that hypocritical smile, but when the captain kissed his closed eyes while securing the toy inside him, Khan could only whimper._

_"My pet."_

_"No, I-I...AH!"_

_Kirk kept making fake soothing noises and talking into his ear while he fucked him with the dildo and Khan tried so hard to block the voice talking to him, but it was so hard when it was right in his ear, whispering how he could not escape, because he deserved this._

_"I will fuck you so you remember your place," he whispered to him, "And I will do it every time I want so you never forget it."_

_"Ah…Ah!" the toy was removed and Kirk's fingers were inside him, three at the time, opening him for his so-called master. Kirk kissed the back of his neck as he thrust himself inside Khan, and the augment could feel the man above him smirking against his skin._

_"You were made for this," he whispered with a low tone that sent shivers down Khan's spine, even with the anger and humiliation boiling in his blood, "When I saw you I knew you were made for me, my sweet pet, look at you, so perfect, completely mine."_

_Khan shook his head in denial, but as Kirk kept fucking him, the nagging voice in the back of his head was starting to agree with his slaver and that disgusted Khan more than he imagined. Kirk was tracing his fingers down Kahn's abdomen and into his unwilling erection, touching and caressing his member to the same rhythm of his thrusts. Khan felt himself close and bit his lip to not say a word, but was unable to stop the moaning coming from his throat as Kirk hit a sensitive spot inside him. The Captain always did that and Khan hated it, being reduced to a sex slave was one thing, but being forced to enjoy it at some degree made the whole thing almost unbearable._

_His master climaxed inside him and a few touches later, Khan was done in Kirk's hand. The captain was licking the corner of his eyes, tasting the unshed tears with satisfaction._

_"We're not done yet, pet." Kirk kissed the corner of his lips and Khan barely suppressed a whimper, "You will spend some more time in the booth."_

_Before Khan could argue, Kirk quickly shifted his writs to be bound behind his back and ripped his clothes to shreds to leave him completely bare, yanking him by the hair to the next room, where a cylindrical pillar stood. Kirk pushed him inside and closed the transparent door, activating the sequence with a grin on his face._

_Khan refused to scream at first, as he always did, but soon his senses were overwhelmed by pain and he succumbed to it as Kirk sat on the floor next to the agony booth, his palm against the glass, looking at him with mock sadness._

_"I wouldn't have to do this if you behave... remember that, yes?"_

_Khan kept screaming and Kirk kept on watching with a grin on his face. Minutes felt eternal and finally the pain stopped, but Khan's senses were so overwhelmed even the carefully touch from Kirk as he took him out of the booth felt like agony. He was taken to the bed were he laid with his eyes tightly screwed shut as Kirk explored his abused body with his hands and without any warning pushed the toy Khan had already forgot back into his body again, making him hiss in discomfort._

_"You should amuse me, pet... so let's continue."_

_Khan did not say a word and stubbornly refused to react, but that only brought him the displeasure of his master. He was ready for another shock when Kirk held him against his chest instead, making him lay on top of him, while he comfortably sat against the pillows, petting his hair and making soothing noises as Khan trembled in his hold._

_Something in Khan just drowned after the day Pavel got hurt because of him. He asked, begged and even dared to demand to know what happened to him, but Kirk would only smirk and silence him. Other days he would describe to Khan a particularly gruesome fate for the younger man, only to later laugh at his slave's distressed expression, remarking how easy was to get to him._

_He didn't see Pavel again, but that meant nothing, the ISS Enterprise was a large ship and Khan was not allowed to move in a lot of its areas and when he tried, the consequences where very, very painful. Still, he tried again and again until the days turned into weeks and then stretched even more, blurring together until he couldn't tell how long has been._

_He fought so hard and lost, and even thinking he kept fighting Kirk took pleasure in beating the spirit out of him. And now, once more held against Kirk and with that was left of his will almost crushed he realized that he truly was the man's slave and for the first time since Kirk got his hands on him, he cried._

_Kirk smiled to himself, licking away the tears from Khan's face, satisfied._

\----------

Khan was listening to Jim and nibbling on a piece of fruit. He was silent and his attention was all focused in the captain, who was talking about how he meet Bones in a far more cheerful tone than the doctor would approve of, judging by his death glare.

"After we got into the Academy we ended up sharing a dorm," Jim smiled fondly, "Too bad he would deny me something for the hangover when he was angry with me and that night after the second time I failed the Kobayashi Maru he was really pissed off."

"You drank yourself stupid and passed out in the goddamn gutter and scared the living daylights out of me, you did not deserve getting off that one easily!" Bones grunted under his breath, "You learned your lesson, so mission accomplished, and eventually you beat the damn test anyway."

"I cheated," Kirk commented casually to a curious looking Khan, "The test could not be passed, ever, Spock made it that way and it was annoying."

"Well, that much is truth," Bones agreed and motioned to the piece of fruit in Khan's hand, "Finish that, ok?"

Khan did so and Jim had to bit his lip to not grin at how protective Bones was getting of Khan. It was fine, Jim had the feeling all of them cared at some degree, because it was so evident they had to do something and Khan was trying very hard to give them the chance to do so.

"What happened after that?" Khan asked in a low voice and even if he was not looking at Jim in the eye, he was trying to relax in his presence, Jim took it as progress.

"Well, then Spock got me into trial for cheating," Jim rolled his eyes, "Should have seen that one coming, anyway."

"But..." Khan trailed off, unsure.

"Yeah?"

"You seem to be in good terms..." Khan looked nervous of talking freely, Bones told him it was most likely to happen, so he had to be patient.

"It's because we are," Jim said proudly, "Many things happened after that and… yeah, we're friends."

Khan slowly nodded, recalling the loyalty between his master and the commander. It existed here as well, but far from the twisted version he was used too... it was strange but he could acknowledge it was better. So he continued listening to the stories Jim had to tell and did his best to disassociate him of the man he disliked so much.

It was proving to be difficult to break that association, but the more Jim talked, the easier it go; because Jim didn't talk as if he was his master, not really, and Khan appreciated that.

Bones came back with Spock, Scotty and Chekov this time and the doctor looked very pleased. Khan shifted nervously on his seat, not comfortable with many people around him, but they didn't surround him at any moment and from the looks, McCoy was making sure to ask for distance when he noticed Khan was getting twitchier.

Khan closed his eyes and stopped breathing when Spock took his right hand and ran his fingers over the manacle, the First Officer was talking about deactivating but by mistake he did exactly the opposite. Khan felt the grip of the manacles draw much tighter and screwed his eyes tightly shut as the manacles started to make pressure on his wrists.

"Oh, no, no, no, no, not happening!"

The pressure stopped and the manacles separated. Khan warily opened his eyes to see Jim using what he knew of the device to separate it and Spock quickly, but with far more care than a moment earlier, took his right wrist again, this time not touching the manacle. Pavel quickly started to work on it, lessening the pressure and turning around the biobed to do the same with the other.

"I apologize," Spock said evenly and he did sound regretful, "I was under the impression only the Captain's DNA was coded in these."

"Well, the other hobgoblin made them, so it makes sense," Bones was besides Khan the moment Pavel let him get closer, "You ok?"

"I..." Khan licked his lips and exhaled, trying to calm his heart rate, "The left one."

Bones nodded, he didn't need another explanation, over the past days he had been able to know Khan better and his reluctance to talk to him had been reduced at some degree, but he was still working on it. Khan for his part was watching Jim, who had taken over holding his right hand from Spock and looking at the wrist, concerned.

Spock looked between his own hand and then at Jim holding Khan's, an idea flashing in his mind. He took out a small key-like object, alike for what Pavel was using to mess with his other wrist along Scotty and frowned.

"I apologize beforehand for this," Spock said and Jim gave him a questioning look. Spock in turn took Jim's hand and pressed his index and middle fingers over the side of the manacle, activating it again.

"Spock what the— wait!"

Spock pressed his own fingers on the other side of the manacle and quickly pressed the fabricated key-like instrument over the bottom of the manacle. There was a sound like a lock opening and the manacle opened, falling to the floor.

Khan's hand was shaking and he looked paler than a few minutes ago. Bones was cursing under his breath and out-loud in random intervals, and ran out of med-bay only to quickly come back with what Jim recognized as an energized blanket that the doctor then put around Khan's shoulders.

"Damn it Spock! You sent him into shock!" Spock stepped aside as Leonard stood before Khan, who looked past them unseeing. He pupils were dilated and his breathing was coming in short gaps. "Khan, come on, Khan? Damn it..."

Jim held Khan's hand, intertwining his fingers with Khan's and with his other hand touched his forearm.

"You are fine," Jim said with a soft but firm voice, making the others look at him oddly. Jim dismissed them for the moment; he had a gut feeling this could work, "You did no wrong."

Khan blinked slowly and his tensed form relaxed. Jim had to move his hand from Khan's forearm to his shoulder to hold him, as he looked as he might collapse at any second. Khan's clouded eyes looked at Jim's hand holding his own.

"You took it off..."

"And we're going to take the other one off too," Jim kept using a soft but firm voice, "Stay still."

He released Khan's hand and signaled Bones to come over and then to Spock to move around to do the same with the other manacle. Again, the movement was fast and the manacle fell with a metallic sound against the floor. Scotty was quickly to collect them and take them off Khan's sight.

"Looks like your key worked, lad," Scotty smiled at Chekov and the younger man nodded in agreement.

"Khan?" Jim was speaking to him again and Khan was staring at him with clouded eyes, "You did fine."

Khan blinked slowly again, turning his gaze to his now free hands, wincing when he tried to turn the left one. Bones gently took the left wrist and started treating it.

"You did it," Khan said again, sounding dazed.

"Yeah," Jim was speaking normal again and Spock looked intrigued about the whole thing, observing as Jim smiled at Khan, "We did."

"You are not like him," the light was returning to Khan's eyes as he searched form Jim's, "You really are not like him."

Before Jim could ask what Khan meant, the augment's eyes rolled into the back of his head and he collapsed on the biobed.

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, many thanks to BotanyCameos for helping me out with the revision of this chapter.

Med-bay was notably calmer. There was still the ever present rush of the medical staff working, but the moment of euphoria caused by the intervention to remove Khan's manacles had settled.

Jim ran his hands through his hair and exhaled deeply, feeling as if a great weight had been lifted off his back, which, to be honest, probably was the case.

"Spock, while I appreciate your efforts and even more the results," Jim leveled his voice as he spoke, a cluster of mixed emotions reflected in his expression, even if Spock could distinguish reluctance as the primary one, "A warning would have been nice..."

Ah, Spock couldn't help but grin at that. Jim's reluctance was due to more personal reasons than what Spock had done. The Vulcan remained silent, just nodding in acknowledgement of his captain's words, too amused to point out the obvious. Leonard, however, was another story.

"Not liking the taste of your own medicine, Jim?" the doctor didn't look up from where he was treating Khan's right wrist. The augment was in a deep slumber, half from the shock and half from whatever was in the hypo Bones gave him for his nerves.

Jim made a face that looked awfully close to a pout, standing closer to Khan's biobed with his arms folded. Spock stood beside him with arms behind his back, looking pleased with himself.

"I apologize for the rashness of my actions, captain," Spock didn't sound apologetic but amused, for a Vulcan at least, "It was not until I accidently activated the manacles that I realized my counterpart's genetic code was encrypted in them as much as yours. I concluded that due to the Vulcan origins of the technology, although it is different in some points, it remains quite similar to what I know. I deduced that both of our genetic signatures were required to activate the manacles and, along with the key designed by Mr. Chekov and Mr. Scott, ultimately remove them." Spock closed his eyes, "The possibility of failure was still present, however.”

"And yet you still risked it," Jim said softly, thinking of the action and how it was performed, "You took the risk of failure upon yourself."

Leonard gently strapped a medical wrist brace over Khan's hand and started to work on the other hand, angrily murmuring under his breath about bones grinding together and pain killers. Spock eyed Khan's unconscious form, looking serious again.

He was not going to say it, but his action was more for Jim's sake than Khan's. If his theory failed, he would have hurt Khan and the resentment would have fallen over him, something that wouldn't particularly affect him – or at least he told himself that, not wanting to remember the uncomfortable feeling of Khan's mistrusting stare. Jim on the other hand had expressed discomfort in the mere idea of being the cause of another's pain, and he had accidentally hurt Khan several times already.

"Fortunately," Spock quickly said, "My theory was correct, and although it was formulated rather quickly, the chances of success were high even if they were not properly calculated. I will refrain from acting in such a way in the future."

Jim folded his arms over his chest, looking around for a distraction, "Yeah, yeah, that's... that's fine Spock, it worked, so it's fine."

"Thank you, captain."

"Yeah, not liking it at all," said Bones looking unamused as he stabilized Khan's readings, ignoring Jim's pout - because it was definitely a pout this time.

The silence stretched around them after that. Khan was in deep slumber, his face relaxed for the first time since he came to the ship. Jim still disliked the view of the collar around his neck and wanted it gone. He felt that knowing how to take the manacles off and being able to do it had finally place them closer to that objective.

Spock tilted his head to a side, observing him in detail. The previous events came back to him and a question formed in his mind.

"Captain," Spock turned to see Jim, "The tone you used with Khan was different than other times."

"Oh, that... well... hum..." Jim looked suddenly embarrassed, "He's been reacting negatively to my voice all this time because of, well, what's been done to him, and Bones confirmed he can't help but be conditioned to what I, well, the other me did, and therefore I, thought..."

"You tried to keep him calm using that fact to your advantage," Spock concluded, his tone implying approval for the action, "It was successful."

"Yes but... it feels wrong... having that power over someone," Jim rubbed his forearm and looked around, not wanting to set his eyes on Khan nor Spock or anyone for the matter.

"Jim," seeing his friend's uneasiness, Bones came closer to intervene, "You may not like that you can do that, but you did help Khan to calm down, especially after Spock sent him into shock."

"That was an unfortunate accident," Spock folded his arms behind his back, avoiding their glances.

"Whatever, my point is: that order you gave Khan helped him, even if we don't like to admit it."

Jim nodded, remembering Khan's words and the recognition that he was different from the man that had done Khan so much wrong, even if they shared the same appearance.

He was not like that man and finally he was able to prove it to Khan.

\----------

_According to History Books, the first Encounter between the Humans and an Alien race was hostile in nature, resulting in the humans defending themselves from their attackers, ultimately killing the aliens they encountered._

_When this incident took place, the Terran Empire already existed. The Empire used the technology acquired from the hostile alien race to upgrade its own technology. After this, the Empire announced the menace of other extraterrestrial races to the population and its defense plan, in the form of a counter-attack._

_The Empire was to attack before being attacked._

_But before taking on space and even thinking of going after other races, The Terran Empire had a history on its origin planet, Earth. It is unclear when the Terran Empire started, but what is clear is that by the 1900's it was already there._

_It was during the 1960's when the Terran Empire created The Kafka Project, a human genetic engineering project. Its objective: to create a superior group of humans for the Empire to rely in. Genetically designed to be superior and trained to be soldiers. The Empire had an army no opposition could take, making its already strong chains even stronger, solidifying an entire planet as one._

_By the 1990’s there was peace on Earth. The Empire started seeing the possibility of expanding its domain beyond the solar system and committed its resources to do it, taking for granted its control over its home planet._

_There was peace on Earth,_ _but only because it had been forced upon the Human race by their own. It was fake, an illusion, but no one was to say a word about it. The Human race was superior and the Empire the government made to show that truth. It was expected for some to resist the idea at some point, for human nature was to resist to ultimatums all the time, but no one thought the rebellion would be born from within the Empire’s own soldiers._

_The progeny of several soldiers of The Kafka Project started to see the Empire for what it was, an oppressive system constructed in bloodshed and injustice. They renounced their status as soldiers of the Empire to instead recognize themselves as Defenders of Humanity._

_The augments started a war against the Empire, wanting to bring real peace to Earth._

_Khan was amongst the offspring of The Kafka Project and was recognized as one of the head fighters against the Empire. He was once an exceptional solider, and now was the most notable Defender of the Rebellion. There was, however, one weakness he could not help: he cared too much._

_Khan was a defender; all his efforts were for those who needed his help and most of all, for his family. In the end it was sentiment that took him down, for the Empire used what he loved the most against him._

_It took a great effort to capture the youngest of the augments and the Rebellion leaders, but the Empire was nothing but persistent. Once they had their leverage, they demanded the Rebellion to cease and its Defenders to surrender._

_Khan feel compromised, but did what he thought was best and in an effort to protect others, he surrendered to The Empire, leaving the Rebellion short of its best Defender in exchange of those involved to be allowed to live._

_Even with Khan’s sacrifice, the Rebellion couldn’t simply stop and they continued their fight. The Empire responded in kind and even worse, for they took the chance to strike even when the rebels could not._

_The Empire crushed the Rebellion, demonstrating its power to those who dared defy them and any other who thought there was any chance against The Empire. However, the worse came afterwards, when the Empire decided to show what happens to those who stand against them._

_The human rebels were imprisoned and some executed, mostly their leaders but it was the augments who suffered the worse fate. All of them were stripped of their human rights, and declared property of their creators and The Empire itself._

_Several of the augments not involved in the rebellion protested this decision. Khan amongst them, stating others shouldn’t pay for his doing, but the Empire cared little for what they had to say. Those who resisted the fate imposed upon them were eventually killed._

_It was a massacre._

_Men, women and children alike were exterminated, if they were children of The Kafka Project and if they resisted the order of being stripped of their rights as a person – for in the eyes of the Empire they were nothing._

_Khan was witness to many executions, being now a slave of the Empire. He cursed his actions and the Empire as a whole. His spirit partially broke from the death of so many caused by what he felt was his fault, but he was a fighter and he would fight until the end._

_He defied those who tried to become his ‘masters’, every single one of them, even when little by little each of them crushed a part of him with their actions. After a few years he was sentenced to be placed in cryogenic sleep to be conserved and used by the Empire in the future. He was not a person after all, he was a possession, a weapon and he was to be treated and stored as such._

_The surviving children of the Kafka Project became scarce and even more those who thought of them as people, until they were forgotten and the few survivors noted as possessions of their masters._

_It was perhaps this, what ultimately broke Khan's faith in mankind, because he fought to defend others and in the end was forgotten, his efforts useless._

_It was hard to believe in humanity when humanity had denied you as one of their own. Khan knew there was still goodness out there, he just couldn’t see it, not even three hundred years later, for he saw the Empire had not changed at all, only became stronger, making other planets part of their dominion though force and enslaving those who opposed them._

_And he was still a possession._

_James T. Kirk had decided to crush all trace of his spirit that he still had left, and the worse part of it was when Khan truly believed the man was succeeding at it, for fighting became harder and harder with each passing day._

\----------

Khan adjusted around his neck the blue scarf he was given by Jim, concealing the collar behind it more efficiently. He felt he stood out too much compared to the others. He was dressed in grey trousers and a long sleeved white shirt, but felt comfortable in his own skin for the first time in a long time. The wrist braces were a welcomed change from the manacles, he felt his body slowly but surely healing the damage done by the manacles and the drain of his strength was now limited to the collar. Jim told him they were going to take that off too, but they were looking for a method that would prevent damage, Jim didn't want to risk hurting him again.

He didn't know how he felt about that.

Before now, he would have never have believed a word coming from James T. Kirk's mouth, but now... the captain had proven he was not the person Khan was used to, and he was not lying, the manacles were off now and they did not plan to put them back on him. In fact Khan witnessed Mr. Spock tear them apart, he knew it was more for scientific motives than to give Khan reassurance but it worked just the same. 

Khan took a deep breath and closed his eyes, exhaling slowly. The sound of his breathing was the only sound in the private quarters he was assigned after Doctor McCoy declared his recovery on schedule and that he was allowed to be relocated now. For a moment he feared being taken back to the brig again, but his fears were proven wrong when he was assigned a regular, secure room. Only the captain, the First Officer and Doctor McCoy knew the code to enter. He was safe aboard this ship.

"Safe..." he whispered, looking away from his reflection. He walked around the room and sat on the bed, convincing himself that this was real.

There was a low beep behind the door, a few moments later it sliced open, letting Jim enter.

"Khan?"

"Yes, captain?" He asked slowly, thinking his words before speaking to not call Jim a name that didn't belong to him. Because this was Jim, not his former master.

"I was wondering if you would like a tour around the ship, you have only been in med-bay, here and the bring don't count," Jim smiled, his good intentions plainly visible on his face, and Khan found himself wondering how a man with the same face could look this different just by the way he smiled.

"S-Sure."

"Awesome, come on, let's go," Jim made a motion, asking him to come with him but keeping distance between them, giving Khan space.

Bones suggested that Jim help introduce Khan to his surroundings, acknowledging that even if the augment's first encounter with Jim had been negative, he had eventually been the only one that could reliably keep Khan calm. Jim was a little overwhelmed by the responsibility but he took it, hoping to really help Khan eventually.

The walk around the ship was uneventful as Jim did his best to keep them away from too crowded places, remembering Bones' comments about the negative reaction Khan showed when being surrounded.

They were crossing one of the engineering bridges when Khan's steps faltered. Jim saw from the corner of his eye as the augment went for the rail to support himself, his knees buckling under him. Before properly thinking what he was doing, he quickly wrapped his arm around Khan's waist, supporting his weigh and preventing him from falling.

"Are you ok?" his voice was full of concern, his eyes quickly searching for something that might tell him what had happened to the augment.

Khan loosely gripped the rail, his writs still sore from the excess pressure of the last time he wore the manacles. He took a deep breath, trying to regain control of himself, but his knees wobbled and he felt his loose grip on the rail slip. Jim was holding him and Khan felt the gentle but firm grip around him help lower him to the floor to lean against the railing of the bridge.

"Khan?" Jim's voice was like a whisper and Khan wondered why this tone felt reassuring instead of the regular feeling of dread he related to Kirk's voice.

The answer to that question came to his mind shortly after, with the memory of that voice carrying a kind and slightly playful tone, along with the image of the man's warm smile. He stopped relating Jim's voice with the other Kirk since he understood they were not the same person. Now more than ever he believed that and even if a part of him was constantly wary that both Kirks might carry similarities, so far it had not happened.

Khan moved his other hand, gently touching Jim's arm around his waist and slowly opened his eyes, feeling the room spinning. He gave a weak grunt and closed his eyes again.

"I feel lightheaded..."

Jim eased Khan to his feet with much care, passing Khan's arm around his neck to support the other man's weight as he helped him cross the bridge.

"I'm taking you to medbay, ok?"

Khan made a noise and Jim couldn't tell if it was of approval or denial, but he hoped Khan would not mind. They were walking slowly and Khan was constantly moving his free hand, the one not in Jim's grip, to support himself on the wall.

"You're going to be ok," Jim reassured, "You probably need to sleep some more and eat, I don't know, but you're gonna be fine, yeah?"

Khan lifted his head, slowly opening his eyes and finding Jim's watching him, a smile on his face and a positive expectation towards him. Khan nodded as his mind tried to not give too much thought to the fact he liked that look in Jim's face; calm, collected, hopeful... so different and yet so similar, like a reversed image of what he knew.

The voices grew louder as they walked and the sounds of a busy medical wing soon reached his ears. He was quickly guided to lay down on a biobed. He could distinguish Doctor McCoy's voice asking him not to sleep just yet, even if he was tired. 

"I knew I should have kept monitoring your poor eating habits, honestly..." Bones was mumbling to himself mostly, something Khan had gotten used in the time he had been in his care, he found it strangely comforting.

"Is he going to be ok?"

Jim was asking about his wellbeing again, maybe expecting a better answer this time. Khan opened his eyes, fixing his gaze on the Captain, who was listening to Bones' explanation with much attention, nodding every once in a while. He walked to what Khan knew was Doctor McCoy's office and shortly came back.

"Khan, hey..." Bones helped Khan to sit up while Jim opened the package he was carrying in his hand and offered him a piece of something brown and creamy with a sweet taste. He vaguely remembered the flavor from his childhood.

"What is this?" He asked, savoring the sweet slowly as Doctor McCoy instructed.

"Chocolate," Jim told him calmly, "Looks like I was right and you need to eat."

"The sugar levels in your blood are very low," Bones explained as he took his readings, "This is just to get them up quickly, you need to eat carbs and I'll give you some instructions to follow to prevent this from happening again."

"Oh..."

Jim smiled again, offering another piece of chocolate. Khan took it without a word, but his mind was racing with questions, the main one being why he couldn't have met this Kirk first instead.

\----------

_He was shivering so hard he could hear his teeth clack together against his will. He grit them to force himself to stop, curling up on himself and running his hands over his bruised aching body, wanting nothing more than to pass out to forget about himself at least for a while._

_The door hissed, letting the light of the hallway filter the room as it opened. He remained in the corner, not wanting to look up. He wasn't ready, it was still too soon._

_He flinched violently as a soft touch landed on his cheek, but he didn't dare to push the other person away._

_"Khan," the feminine voice whispered urgently, "Khan, please look at me."_

_Uncertain, he opened his eyes looking into Carol's. She was carrying something against her chest and looking as if she was about to cry, eying him up and down warily._

_Khan suddenly felt a spark of anger at her judging gaze. He hissed at her, showing his displeasure and Carol in return looked even sadder. Khan narrowed his eyes as she pushed what he was carrying into his arms._

_"Clothes and I have some medical supplies with me, let me get the worse bandaged ah..." She shook her head, blinking away tears, "We have to get you out of here."_

_"D-Don't y-you dare p-play with m-me!"_

_"I'm not playing," She quickly took some cleaning pads and started wiping the blood from his wrists, ignoring when he tried to push her away, "Stop that, we don't have much time, I got a shuttle ready and loaded, you're getting out of here now."_

_"Carol..." Khan hissed in anger, "He's going to shock me until I pass out."_

_"I tampered with the system," Carol closed her eyes, collecting herself, "You have some time before the signal comes back, but for a while the collar won't work and you will get out of the Enterprise, you hear me? Now get dressed."_

_Khan eyed her with great suspicion but Carol pretended not to notice and just turned around to give him a sense of privacy as he put on the ragged and battered clothes, she even brought a cloth he could use to cover the collar. It was nothing fancy, he had worn them before and that's why the clothes were so worn out, but it would do._

_"Why are you doing this?"_

_"Because..." She looked conflicted, "Because I should have done it a long time ago."_

_"You know this is suicide, he's going to catch me and make me wish I had never awoken in this century." Khan accused, "Do you want me do die?"_

_"No!" after shouting she covered her mouth, scared that someone might have heard. She took a deep breath and glared, "No, I want you to live, as far away from this crew as possible."_

_"Carol..."_

_"The shuttle has weapons and I also brought you that," she pointed to a metal case near the door, looking disgusted. "The... stuff you made with Spock."_

_Khan moved quickly, almost pushing her away. Carol didn't seem fazed, she looked somewhat annoyed, but her eyes were watering again. Khan checked the contents of the metal case and nodded._

_"This is not going to work."_

_"Do you have a better plan?" Carol hissed in anger, Khan gave her an unimpressed look in return._

_"I don't," he sighed, "But I will fight him, and this plan, even knowing it will likely not work, is better than just laying there and taking another round."_

_Khan took the metal case and closed his eyes, making up his mind. He was going to try and escape. Even if he knew he would most likely fail, he wanted to try. To remain himself so that he could still fight, to show that James T. Kirk had not broken all of his spirit, not yet._

_His smile was bitter as Carol guided him in the shadows of the Enterprise and to a fight where he had zero advantages._

_There was an inner voice telling him he should just accept his fate, because this was his life and this act of rebellion would change nothing, like it changed nothing three hundred years ago._

_He ignored it._

 ----------

Jim stared at the little cylindrical piece of technology in his hand, analyzing every detail and pondering on how it was for the most part a smooth surface. The interesting thing about that device was the complex mechanism inside, designed by Spock and Jim both, but unable to be tested just yet. They couldn't risk failure and that was what made Jim really anxious.

"Captain," Spock called for his attention, giving him an even look. Jim noted he had stopped walking and was in the middle of the hallway, just staring at the tool in his hand.

"Ah, yes."

They continued their walk to Khan's room. Because Jim was holding what he hoped was a functional key to take off the collar Khan was wearing, hopefully.

Jim had taken to spending almost all of his free time with Khan and it had been positive to them both. Khan was making significant progress in adapting and generally feeling better. His episodes of dizziness had grown less frequent as his eating habits got better and his stressed posture around people slowly relaxed.

Now they were going to try and help him again, but Jim feared that if this didn't work, it would destroy the progress they had already made. It was a valid fear, but he also knew he had to risk the relative safety of the situation they had reached with Khan in order to make proper progress.

When they reached Khan's room, Bones was already waiting for them. He was standing outside in the hall, leaning against the wall and looking unconvinced.

"I really hope this works."

"There's a 62% chance that this process will be successful," Spock said with all the confidence he usually used when talking numbers and gave Bones no reassurance at all, "Even with the 38% chance of failure, the risk is worth taking."

"Spock, we're talking about a collar than can shock him to death, I'm pretty sure those numbers mean little when talking about a goddamn lightning bolt hitting you."

"It's not electricity precisely, it's more like—"

"It still looks like it damn well hurts!"

"Hey, stop you two!" Jim rolled his eyes, "I'm going to ask him first."

Spock and Bones exchanged looks and slowly nodded. Jim resisted giving a frustrated sigh and entered the code to open the door.

"Khan, can we come in?"

Khan was sitting in a chair, reading from a PADD and looking fairly calm, "Yes, go ahead."

Jim approached him, looking a bit uncomfortable, but that didn't stop him, "We... managed to create a key that might be able to open that collar," Jim said, "However, there's still a risk of it not working..."

"Try it."

Khan didn't even blink.

"A-Are you sure?"

"Yes."

Jim nodded and motioned for him to sit on the bed. Khan moved confidently, although inside he was nearing the edge of panic, even if he refused to show it. He sat on the bed and closed his eyes when Spock pressed his fingers against one side of the collar while Jim did the same on the other side, holding the key against the back of the collar with his other hand.

"I just want you to know," Jim said softly, "That I don't want to hurt you. I will never deliberately hurt you."

Before Khan could process that thought, Jim pressed the key and the augment felt his world rock violently with a mixture of lack of oxygen and overwhelming pain. He felt himself falling but never hit the ground and the pain slowly but steadily passed.

Khan blinked away the moisture in his eyes, clearing his vision and taking note of his surroundings. Noting he was kneeling on the floor being supported by another person.

Jim was holding him.

Khan breathed in the Captain's scent and closed his eyes. His trembling hand instinctively went up reaching for the tag in his collar and instead collided with his sore skin. His eyes snapped open and Jim gently let him go as Khan urgently touched his neck, feeling himself free of the collar for the first time in a very long time. He stared at Jim, who was holding the key in his hand and his eyes moved to Spock, who had the offending object in his hands and was looking at it with distaste, Spock gaze shifted to him and his eyes softened, nodding to him in acknowledge.

"You did it."

"Sorry about the shock," Jim mumbled and gave him a small smile.

Leonard had kneeled besides them, gently checking over Khan, who looked around confused, as if the reality of what had just happened was slowly sinking in his mind.

"I-I-I..."

"It's ok." Jim said gently and it was if a way of calmness washed over him by just hearing such simple words.

Khan couldn't help it; he chuckled softly and finally made proper eye contact with Jim, who offered Khan his hand. He hesitated for a moment, but Jim didn't move his hand away. After a few seconds, Khan took Jim's hand. 

"Thank you."

His hand in Jim's feel right for some reason he couldn't explain, but that was fine by him. 

\----------

The panel showed an alert after a long time of no signal. The Vulcan noted this immediately, smiling to himself as he marked the coordinates. He turned around and stood up to walk the short distance towards the man he was to report to, standing straight with his  hands behind his back as he spoke.

"Captain, I found him."

In the captain's chair of the ISS Enterprise, a grin formed in the lips of James T. Kirk. He relaxed, leaning on his left elbow and supporting his chin on his hand, observing the image onscreen before them, showing Engineering, where two containers held separately blue and red matter, and a separate screen showing the newly found coordinates. 

"Well done Spock, now... let's get our dear Khan back where he belongs."


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BotanyCameos was her awesome self again and helped me out to beta-read this chapter. Thank you Bot, you're awesome.

_Captain's log, reserved entry number 23._

_According to Doctor McCoy's reports, our cross-dimensional guest's health has significantly improved since the collar was taken of - for medical details, refer to Dr. McCoy's logs._

_In plain sight, I can validate the reports’ contents. I have witness this continued progress in health and strength myself. He is still being monitored by the medical staff._

_Our guest’s interaction with the rest of the crew is still limited, for his own safety rather than others. He has proven not to be hostile and any previous display of aggression was in self-defense in what he thought was a threatening moment, rather than an actual attack._

_There has also been some improvement in his psychological state, manly his mistrust to interact with a few selected members of the crew, Doctor McCoy and myself has considerably reduced._

_I am very aware that for better results, our guest should be transferred to a proper facility at some point; however, I am reluctant to do so, for his reaction to this may be negative and destroy the progress we have already achieved. We are too far from Earth and I don't want to hand over this responsibility to any other Starfleet crew unless necessary. Doctor McCoy's reports so far support my decision, therefore until further notice, we shall remain as such._

_Mr. Spock suggested that further interaction with some key elements of the crew was recommended to encourage trust between our guest and us; so far it had been a constant trial and error with some positive results._

_I want to get this right._

_Kirk out._

\----------

The planet they were exploring had an intense flora covering most of its surface. Bright colors adorned the leaves and trees along with enormous flowers of a variety of shades and forms that made them feel like bugs in a garden. It was a sight to behold. The fauna was either friendly or reserved and beyond that they had not encounter other native population.

So far the exploring mission had gone smoothly; the science team was able to collect enough material for analysis and the information required to classify the planet. Another positive outcome of this visit had been not related to their exploring mission, but Jim counted it as being just as important.

Bones was the one who suggested taking Khan to the surface of the planet, McCoy joined them for the event and they ended up separating into two groups. The larger, main one was to focus on their exploring mission, while the second, smaller one was to do some different exploring of their own. Jim was directing the second group, which consisted of him, McCoy, three security officers and Khan. They had a simpler mission... and by mission Jim meant reintroducing Khan to his newfound freedom among them.

It was... complicated.

Now he was keeping his distance from Khan, who was staring at the enormous flowers with a small frown on his face. The wrist braces had come off, as they were no longer required. He was wearing the standard non-ranked uniform of the crew, black boots, dark trousers and a long sleeved black shirt. What Jim didn't get was why he was still wearing the blue scarf he gave him. The collar was gone and his neck mostly healed, but Khan appeared to be much more comfortable wearing the scarf.

Jim was glad he had at least chosen a good one; it was longer than a regular one, it served as protection from direct sun exposure, as well to protect the mouth and eyes from blown dust and sand. He had used it in the past for an exploring mission in a planet that was mostly a desert surface; it was practical at the time. Khan on the other hand was using it for everything.

Jim tried to not give it much thought, but being honest, he couldn't. He was well aware that everything Khan did was for a reason; he just hoped this was not a negative reaction to his past experiences.

"Found something interesting?"

Khan tensed upon hearing Jim's voice, but it was short lived and if Jim had not been paying attention he would have missed. The augment looked over his shoulder and shook his head slowly.

"No, it just..." He looked back to the flower, frowning, "I've never seen something like this before."

"It's pretty impressive, right?"

Jim strolled closer, keeping his posture casual and calm as Khan touched the petals, feeling the silk like surface of the plant.

"It makes me wonder if the fauna has a proportional size to the flora," Khan looked towards the horizon, "Although we have not encountered hostile native fauna."

"Spock and the science team did a scan before we got down; it appears everything in this plant varies in size, so it is possible we encounter something rather large among their fauna."

"Oh..."

Khan was looking tense again and that was setting all kinds of alarms for Jim. He looked over his shoulder towards Bones and signaled him to come over.

"Maybe we should reunite with the rest of the team," Jim suggested as casually as possible, "Unless you want to explore some more?"

Khan shook his head slowly and it was only when Bones took him by the arm that he actually moved from the spot he was, leaving Jim wondering what just happened.

\----------

The second attempt to explore the planet - and by explore Jim still meant helping Khan - was considerable more successful than the first one.

They had an encounter with the local fauna at the edge of the forest, where a creature that Jim could only describe as adorable got fascinated with Khan and followed him around.

The creature looked like a seal, it was green and it seemed to be associated with earth instead of water and it moved as if it was 'swimming' in the ground. Jim dubbed it 'forest seal' and Spock remarked it was most likely not its name. Jim waved him off; he was rather busy looking at Khan's confused face as the forest seal made cute noises wanting the augment’s attention.

Khan awkwardly petted the forest seal and it made a happy sound, snuggling Khan and demanding to be petted again. Khan finally smiled at it and ran his hand over its flank, feeling its fur.

"It's like touching moss."

Spock got closer to them and touched the seal as Khan had been doing, "Fascinating."

Jim was too pleased to say anything, so he just enjoyed the moment.

\----------

Bones was running across the forest holding a locator device, constantly switching his view from the ground he was stepping on and the tree tops, trying to not lost sight of Khan. His patient was currently showing his renewed strength by climbing the tall trees and jumping from one to another using the thick vines hanging from the branches.

A great number of creatures that appear to be a mixture between the flora and fauna kept appearing once the forest seal made a loud happy sound after being petted. There were birds that looked as if they were covered in shinny crystals wrought over their bodies and animals that had leaves and flowers as part of their anatomy. The science team was having a blast with the new discovery and McCoy... McCoy was chasing his patient around the forest to keep an eye on him, Jim and the security officers close behind them.

"I guess he feels better," Jim commented almost out of breath, supporting his hands on his knees when they came to a stop. He lifted his head to see Khan standing on a tall tree, one arm outstretched to let a colorful bird rest on it while he used the other to balance himself on the tree.

"Captain!" Khan sounded happy and it made Jim feel strangely good, "I found something."

Bones was chuckling at the whole scene, "You better get him down before nightfall."

"Should I?" Jim made a face.

"He's way better now," Bones was looking at his scanner with interest, "But I don't want to risk it, so..."

"You're right though, we don't know if this place is hostile at night."

Jim sighed and took the vine closer to climb up the tree, easily getting besides Khan in the rather large branch. He took as step back when the bird Khan had in his arm made a high pitched sound, like a pan flute, and flipped its wings. It was bright yellow with green rock like moles growing in its head, making it look as if had a carnival mask made of emeralds around its eyes and part of the head. Jim tilted his head to a side getting his hands up to show he was not hostile and the bird calmed down, letting itself be petted by Khan.

"They seem to like you," Jim said in soft voice, fascinated by how easily Khan got along the animals once he felt enough confidence in himself to do so.

"They are enthralling," Jim had to bit his lip to not giggle at Khan's choice of words, he sounded like Spock sometimes, "They seem be a fusion between Botanic and Metazoa, most of those we have seen are literally animals that grow plants as part of their body or other kind of earth based structure, such as this one that has external bones with the appearance of minerals."

Khan thumbed the bird in between the eyes and it chirped before flapping its wings and flying away, leaving behind a large feather. Khan took the feather and pointed in the directing the bird went, showing Jim what he found. Far from they were, there was a mountain and atop of it was an enormous tree where many birds were flying towards, it seemed to be their shared nest area.

Jim took out his binoculars and set them to look beyond that point. "The forest ends as the mountain begins and the ground changes... you think the fauna changes as well?"

"Most probably," Khan's voice was very even, he almost sounded relaxed. Jim couldn't help but stare, which prompted Khan to ask, "Is there a problem?"

"No, no, not at all!" Jim was quick to shift his gaze somewhere else, "I was just... you seem to know a lot about this and... I was just wondering..." Jim sighed, "Nah, forget it, never mind."

Khan frowned at this, looking rather confused and Jim hoped this was not going to have a negative impact. His fears were quickly proven wrong when Khan leaned against the large tree trunk, looking ahead.

"I was trained to be a defender, but I had always had a great interest in science. Botany and zoology, being amongst my favorites," Khan casted his eyes down, his smile suddenly looking sad, "However, the situation called for my other aptitudes to outstand."

Jim slowly extended his hand towards Khan, offering in for the other man to take, "Its ok."

"Captain?"

Khan looked unsure and Jim just smiled at him, "You're ok now, because you're with us."

That got Jim a slightly shocked expression that slowly morphed into a soft smile. Khan took Jim's hand and both came down the tree, where Bones was waiting with a smug expression that Khan did not notice and that made Jim glare at his friend, who chuckled.

"I bet Spock would like to hear what you found, Khan," Jim quickly said to prevent Bones from making a comment that surely would make him feel embarrassed, "About the mix of plant and animal."

"Mr. Spock most likely came to the same conclusion as me, he may even have found more details about it," Khan dismissed his own theories quickly but Jim was not about to let it happen.

"Still, nothing to lose, it would be an interesting conversation at least, don't you think?"

Khan nodded slowly, not the reaction Jim was hoping for, but at least he was not insisting in dismissing his own ideas or not talking to Spock at all, that was good enough for Jim.

\----------

The large yellow feather had several bits of mineral in it, making it contrast in the light. Khan turned over the magnified lens several times, taking into account everything he found and storing the data in the PADD Spock game him.

The first officer was with him in the lab, analyzing and cataloging the information collected that day. Spock noted how Khan would sometimes get distracted when Spock was too close and forced himself to relax to keep working. This made the Vulcan anxious, even if he did not like to admit it, he reached the conclusion that something needed to be done about it.

"Khan," Spock called in his even voice, "Am I making you uncomfortable?"

The question was direct, even somehow blunt and it would probably make McCoy angry at him for his already noted bedside manner, but he didn't have a better way to approach the issue at the moment, and besides Khan seemed to be considering answering him, for he was looking down in deep thought.

"I was experiencing a flashback," Khan informed him in a tired voice, "I used to work along the other version of yourself."

"Oh."

Spock did not have a concrete reply to that, or maybe he did... He had multiple questions for which he wanted answers from Khan, but they were such that he just seemed to be able to form a convoluted version of them in his mind rather than find a way to properly voice them. He blinked several times, looking visibly confused.

"He was rather demanding," Khan explained. "To be honest, I did not understand him most of the time. I always thought Vulcans would dislike the Empire as other races do."

Something came to Spock's mind after that comment and he slowly approached Khan, the question finally forming in his mind to be voiced.

"Vulcans?" He asked and quickly noted it was not a real question, so he completed, "Vulcan still exists in your universe?"

"Yes?" Khan blinked a couple of times, "It's one of the planets conquered by the Empire. Although that was a long time ago and a great part of its population stands within it rather than under it, contrary to other races."

Spock looked distressed and that was saying much. Khan shifted from one foot to another, running a hand up and down his arm, unsure of what to do now.

"My planet was destroyed," Spock looked more as if he was thinking out loud than actually talking to Khan, "This event changed many, many things... and... a few of us still survived, we are trying to rebuild our race."

"I... I'm sorry."

Spock suddenly was looking at him now, his stare fixed in Khan's eyes with a storm of emotions that normally would be under perfect control flashing on his own eyes. "Why?"

"Excuse me?"

"Why are you apologizing? You do not know how I feel."

"I..." Khan took a deep breath, "Actually I do, for my own people was destroyed a long time ago."

Spock stared at him in silence for a long time, slowly regaining his composure. Spock closed his eyes, nodding. "I apologize, my behavior was uncalled for."

"Would you like to see?" Khan's voice was so low, Spock almost didn't hear him.

"Pardon me?"

Khan was not looking at him, he was actually doing his best to avoid looking at Spock in the eye and the first officer had to get closer to properly hear him, before asking, "Are you suggesting something?"

"I was on Vulcan before coming here," Khan said, "He sometimes would get into my head and see things I saw."

"Mind-meld."

"Yes..."

Spock noted that even if Khan had been the one who put the suggestion on the table, he looked very reluctant and that made Spock conclude that he was not comfortable with the idea.

"If you would rather not, I will respect that. However, I am grateful for the intention."

Khan looked somehow relived and they kept on working in silence for a while. After the hour had passed, Khan was no longer looking relieved, but mostly confused and he kept quickly shifting his gaze between his research and Spock.

They were close to end the session when Khan spoke again.

"Is there a way for it to not be painful?" Khan asked without looking at Spock and the Vulcan took a second to understand what he was talking about.

"The mind-meld does not have to hurt," He explained and suddenly the image formed in his mind; his other-self forcing his mind on Khan's against his will. He quickly looked at Khan, who appeared somehow resigned. "I will not hurt you, Khan."

"In that case..." He turned around and closed his eyes, "Go ahead."

Spock could tell Khan did not trust him to be honest, even thinking Vulcans do not lie – for the most part, anyway. This was a chance to prove he was speaking nothing but truth. Spock placed his fingers on Khan's face and closed his eyes.

"Our minds are one..."

He did not force the meld; he just gave a gentle push, allowing Khan to reject him if he wanted to. It took a moment for the other to allow him inside his mind and once he did, Spock shared his own memories with Khan.

Spock saw a twisted version of the world he called home once. Images of people he knew, distorted into something he could barely recognize. He saw himself and Jim and felt disbelief at how alike and contrary at the same time these people were from himself and the captain.

He felt his eyes water at the wave of emotions that were not his own slamming into his being. Hatred, fear, hopelessness, resignation and self-loathing combined in such level it was quickly overwhelming him. These were scraps of Khan's emotions through his entire ordeal, being shared along his memories. Spock knew he couldn't just end the connection like this, it seemed so unfair...

He shifted the vision and remembered the day the dramatic encounter with Khan's counterpart came to an end, and the subsequent events. He shared what he felt in the moments after the battle; hope, relief, acceptance and finally calm. They had survived, all of them.

Spock gently took his hand away from Khan's face, noting his fingers were wet. He looked at the other man, who was silently letting the tears fall. Spock wiped his own face, feeling tears he had not noticed before as well.

"I... did I hurt you?"

"No." Khan smiled at him and Spock felt guilty for some reason, "I'm just... grateful."

"Khan?"

"You all still helped me out, even thinking I have the face of the man who did you and your loved ones so much wrong," Khan almost choked in between sobs, "He got him killed."

Jim, Khan was talking about Jim.

"It was Jim's choice," Spock tried to justify softly, "It was... only logical."

"You don't believe that, Mr. Spock," it was true, he had shared the memory with Khan after all, "I'm glad there was something that could be done, in the end."

Spock sighed, closing his eyes, listening as Khan was doing his own effort to regain control of himself, he felt that he understood the man in front of him so much more now and it was both good and utterly confusing.

But there was something he felt he had to say, it was... logical. Spock smiled to himself.

"You are not that man, Khan," his words were even and sincere, "In the sense of what really matters, you truly are better."

When Spock opened his eyes, Khan was staring at him in a mixture of surprise and disbelief. Spock offered him his hand and Khan looked down at it for a moment, before taking it with a smile on his face.

"I can say the same of you, Mr. Spock."

\---------

The Enterprise's shuttle landed once more on the planet's surface after confirming there was no native population beyond the fauna in the area, and the investigations continued.

Khan had a theory that the fauna adapted to the geographic around it, hence the reason it was closely tied to the elements around it. This was later confirmed when they were exploring the mountainside in the area, where they found animals that displayed trends tied to minerals.

Spock was looking closely at an amber bear-like creature that appeared to have yellow crystals over part of its body; the most fascinating thing about the cub was that the crystals sparkled with threads of electricity when it was excited. Currently the cub was running around him and head-butting his flank every once in a while.

"I'm unsure of what it wants," Spock extended his hand but retrieved it when sparks of electricity emerged from the crystals on the cub's back.

"I think it just wants to play," Jim looked at Spock over his shoulder and pointed at Khan, who was using a small device to produce sounds similar to a flute, making the other cub produce sparks of electricity in tune of the music.

Spock took out a similar device to the one Khan was using and activated it, blowing out low music tunes and earning the bear-like creature's amusement.

Khan smiled down at the cub as it retrieved its sibling and walked away from them. He had enough data to classify the creature and had even collected a crystal that had fallen off the cub's back; it seemed they shed them as earth animals would shed their fur. He was too concentrated in his research task to notice the not so discreet looks Jim would send his way. The Captain looked pleased but sometimes he was worried, perhaps thinking too much to himself.

Spock knew what was bothering Jim, as they had talked about it recently. The Captain was unsure of what Khan's future would be; he had to submit a report to the Federation with the whole list of events from the moment they encountered this alternate version of Khan until this day, after which a decision would be taken and it would most likely involve Khan leaving the Enterprise. Spock understood Jim's worries, even more so after sharing memories with the augment, so he made a suggestion. If that situation came to pass, they would look after Khan's safety, one way or another.

\----------

Jim’s communicator went off and The Captain immediately picked up the call, "Kirk here."

"Captain," Uhura's voice transmitted, "We picked up a distant space anomaly, you may want to see this."

"Space anomaly? We're on shore," Jim was moving towards the area where a shuttle was waiting as he spoke, followed close behind by Spock.

"Yes captain, and yet the magnitude of the backlash from this anomaly was enough to be caught by our sensors. Whatever it is we are only retrieving an echo."

"On my way," Jim stopped suddenly, "Everyone, we're going back to the ship!"

Khan got in the shuttle with the security officers and the science team. Jim and Spock were talking about the possible anomaly and what it meant.

They were very near the area where the ship was waiting when the shuttle was hit by an attack and sent to the ground.

The shuttle had quickly tried for evasive maneuvers and had managed to perform them in a nick of time, but they were still hit and the damage that was done they were going to try and crash-land. Khan felt as the security officers forced a back-pack onto his arms and suddenly they were evacuating the crashing shuttle. In a mixture of noise and confusion, Khan barely registered his own movements until he was falling into the ocean. He remembered the back-pack and quickly pulled the oxygen device over his mouth before he hit the water and his vision got dark.

Instinct took over; he swam as fast as he could, looking for the rest of the team yet finding himself near the shore, alone. There was a rising smoke column not too far from where he was, probably were the shuttle had crashed. He swallowed hard, hoping everyone was ok.

We he reached shore; it took him a moment to regain his breath. He sat on the sand against a rock, taking deep breaths, concentrating in the sounds around him.

The sun was setting when a figure came closer, its form casting a large shadow over Khan. For a moment he couldn't see but soon he noticed it was Jim standing over him.

"There you are."

He was about to answer when he noticed the dark uniform with the golden stripes and the pin with the Sword across the Earth over his breast, as well as the posture and the smirk on his face. He felt his heart drop as it was clear this man was not 'Jim'.

"You...!"

"Hello, pet!" Kirk's smirk sent a shiver down Khan's spine, "I've missed you."

Khan stared at the man that did so much wrong to him for a moment, his heart pounding in his ears as his mind screamed for him to move and yet his body was not obeying. It wasn't until Kirk took another step towards him than he got to his feet and ran. Kirk chuckled at this, amused by the action. He let Khan run several feet before taking his agonizer out and shooting three times, sending Khan to the ground.

"Tsk, tsk, tsk..." Kirk toyed with the agonizer, walking over Khan to sit on his back, smiling at his weak struggles. He petted Khan's hair in a mockery of affection. Khan renewed his efforts and tried to push Kirk off him, managing to tumble down the Terran Captain and struggling with him in the sand before Kirk rolled over and sat on him again, "Misbehaving already?"”

"Get off me!"

Kirk chuckled down at him, lowering his body to be face to face with Khan, stealing a kiss from him, "You're mine pet, don't forget that."

Kirk pulled the water soaked scarf from the augment's neck, tossing it aside. He made a face when he found the collar gone. He eyed Khan with displeasure before shooting him again. He observed how Khan struggled with the pain caused by the agonizer for a moment, then took his communicator out.

"Beam us up!" he ordered happily and Khan felt his world crash as the lights surrounded him, and he knew no more.

\----------

Jim woke up with a feeling of dread deep inside; he looked around alarmed, noting he was in medbay and immediately got up, sending a wave of pain across his body.

"Bones?" The doctor was at his side immediately and the look on his face told Jim bad news already, "What…?"

"The shuttle was attacked, you had to jump off before it crashed, Spock is still unconscious but he is going to be fine. Johnson and Durbin made it safely but we couldn't find Elston and Khan for hours."

Bones was looking at him in the eye, his expression serious and Jim just wanted him to get on with whatever he was going to say already, because he couldn't take the pressure.

"Just... Just say it."

"No Jim, they're not— not that." Bones took a deep breath, "We found Elston, he was severely injured but saw enough to give us an idea of what is going on." He moved to retrieve something from behind them "Elston told us he was about to get Khan when he was attacked by someone he swears looked just like you and when he woke he found this on the beach."

Bones gave Jim a blue scarf and a metal pin in the shape of the Earth with a sword across it.

Jim stared at the objects in his hands as the images came to his mind; The anomaly in space, Elston being attacked, Khan missing and leaving behind his scarf and a Terran Empire pin…

"He's got him," Jim said behind clenched teeth, "That bastard got him!"

"Jim!"

Bones and Jim turned around as Spock pushed the curtain aside; he was being held by the arm by one of the nurses, but the Vulcan first officer ignored her.

"Spock get back to bed, you're not fine!"

"Doctor, you don't understand, we cannot let—" Spock almost fell to the floor, but McCoy ran to his side to help him out as the nurse moved to at least get a chair for Spock to sit down, "He cannot bear it, it would be too much for him."

"Spock?"

The Vulcan closed his eyes, "He allowed me to unite my consciousness with his own not long ago, and I felt what he felt. Is too soon, he's not—"

"It won't happen." Jim said firmly, stunning Spock and Bones into silence. He looked ahead with determination and some fire in his eyes as he twisted the scarf in his hand, holding the pin so hard it broke and hurt his hand, letting a few drops of blood fall, "We are going to get him back."


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks a bunch to BotanyCameos for helping out with the revision of this chapter.

When Captain Kirk named Matt Elston one of Khan's guards, the man wasn't thrilled about it. He was really unsure of how to feel and that made his job a bit complicated. His team mates, Edward Johnson and Nathan Durbin were more or less in the same position as him, except Nathan had his doubts for completely different reasons than Edward and Matt. 

Nathan was worried that they might do something unintentionally wrong that could tip Khan off into some sort of panic attack and slow down his recuperation progress, because of course Nathan read all the damn reports before Edward and Matt did it and he understood the extent of the importance that being assigned to protect their inter-dimensional guest implied. 

Matt felt like hitting his head against the wall, he was being judgmental. This was not the same man that got the Enterprise in so much danger two years ago. He looked like him, yes, but he was not John Harrison, or Khan, whatever. Matt shared a look with Edward after Nathan finished voicing his concerns about how they were to proceed with their assignment and why is was very, very important to follow Doctor McCoy's instructions. 

"You were thinking about the other Khan, weren't you?" whispered Edward once Nathan was engrossed enough in reciting McCoy's medical report to not notice they were talking.

"Totally," Matt admitted. "I feel bad now."

"Same here," Edward grimaced, "I want to make it up for that."

"Gotta work hard then," Matt said as he took the PADD and started to read the detailed reports, "The Captain chose Nathan well, he's good with this psychology stuff... I shouldn't be here... I'm going to screw this up."

"Have a little faith in yourself Matt, the Captain chose you for a reason too." Edward assured with a smile, Matt returned the gesture and motioned to Nathan, who was not staring at them with an unimpressed expression. 

"Are you two done?"

"Cheer up Nath and tell us more about the guy we're to look after, don't wanna screw this up," Matt said as cheerfully as he managed, running hand across his brown hair and flashing his teammates a cocky smile.

Nathan walked over to him and tapped the PADD Matt was holding to open the file he was previously reading out loud while Edward tried to not chuckle. "He's name is Khan and he's... well, unstable is an understatement."

Edward scrolled down in reading his own PADD, "They just managed to get the manacles and the collar off recently and Doctor McCoy is putting the emphasis on monitoring him for any negative reactions but because being in a crowd appears to be a trigger, they're assigning a small personal security team to look after him, that's us."

Nathan nodded, "We have a meeting with the Captain and him in an hour. They want us to help to make him more comfortable around people."

Matt bit his lip, looking nervous, "That might be a bit harder than we expected."

Captain Kirk introduced them to Khan in a very casual small meeting and Matt didn't even want to look the guy in the eye because he didn't know how to think, what to say, how to act. He was so not meant to be here. Matt could think of at least five other people more qualify to do this than him, even Edward was acting calm.Heck... He was talking to the guy, which was so much more than what Matt had done. 

Matt was two seconds away from requesting to be reassigned when he heard a polite cough coming from behind him, turning around he found Khan fidgeting but looking at him. Matt was too stunned to say anything. 

"Ah... here," Khan offered him a sealed drink, Matt's preferred choice of drink, "Edward told me you might like it."

"T-Thanks," Matt took the drink from Khan and stared at the medical wrist bands. After some time, Matt noticed he was staring, "S-Sorry!"

"Don't worry," Khan looked around the room and then back to the wrist braces, "They do stand out a little."

"But..." Matt took a deep breath, "Are they actually helping?"

"Quite a lot, yes," Khan nodded as he turned his hands, flexing his fingers, "I might be able to take them off in a few more cycles."

Matt didn't notice when the conversation subject changed to other topics, like the ship and what one could find in the rec rooms. But he did noticed when Khan was relaxed enough to look at him in the eye with no problem. 

For Matt it was easy to talk, being honest and asking questions in the best way he could find to get closer to his charge was something that he could do by just being himself, and even when the questions were a bit difficult, Khan eventually answered them, because Matt always told him he didn't have to answer if he didn't want to, and that he could easily ignore him, because he was an idiot, to witch Khan was quick to counter him, pointing out Matt was, in fact, not an idiot. 

Nathan shared Khan's like for literature, Edward was a great training partner and Matt... Matt was honest and dedicated, and proven to be the right choice to help Khan as his other team mates were. 

It was a duty they got to like and that was why when the shuttle was about to crash-land that Matt was quick to get Khan out of it to save him. He traced the fall trajectory, hoping to find Khan quickly and reunite with the rest of the team. He didn't expect to be attacked by someone who looked a lot like his Captain or to wake up from said attack to find Khan missing. 

It was easily one of the most terrible moments he had experienced in his life, because he had never felt so helpless and defeated before, he just hoped he could help to make it right, somehow.

\----------

Jim closed his eyes, folding his arms over his chest as he listen to Elston explain his encounter with Jim's counterpart. The description was very much identical to him, expect in details like the way the man carried himself and the way he was dressed.

"I was about to call him Captain," Elston said quietly, "But I noticed the clothes and that smirk, it was all wrong and he shot me with something like a phaser, but it was way more painful and it knocked me out."

Elston was still in recovery and Jim was talking to him in medbay. The man looked distressed, feeling angry with himself over the situation. Jim could understand why. 

"You did what you could," Jim was sure he did. "Now we have to get him back."

"That man that looked like you... that's the Captain of the crew he was running away from, isn't he?"

"Yeah..." 

Elston didn't say anything and Jim ordered him to rest and recover, he had other duties to attend, starting with getting Khan back. 

Jim was well aware that now they had to make a plan to catch up with the other Enterprise. It was not difficult to find, the ship was in the same quadrant as them, really close to the planet they had been exploring. The problem was going near them, as Spock and Carol mentioned that according to the information shared by Khan, and the logs in the shuttle, the ISS Enterprise was the pride of the Empire, for being one of the most dangerous ships not only due to superior technology, but mostly because of her crew.

Now Jim was in his ready room, trying to come up with a plan that may give them a chance to actually stand against basically themselves. It was harder than he expected. 

The door slid open, Spock entered the room and closed the door behind him. His posture was stiff but he looked focused, decided and Jim frowned at that. 

"Spock?"

"The First Officer of the ISS Enterprise is a man completely loyal to his Captain; he does not question him, does not go against his orders and even comes up with new and fresh ideas to indulge in his Captain's desires, no matter how cruel these may be. However, he also seeks a benefit to himself by doing as he does, mostly in the science perspective of his studies among other things. By creating the manacles and collar that would hold Khan as his 'master' desired, in exchange he would have Khan working for him to create this," Spock held up a small vial with a single drop of blue matter, "He also indulges in other more carnal desires, such as forcefully mind-melding with Khan to have a full extent of his knowledge as well as his experiences."

Jim stared at his first officer in confusion and the Vulcan moved closer to his captain, now his determinate façade looked a little less solid, as if doubt was threatening to surface, "I know this because Khan shared his memories with me and I was able to analyze what he knew of my counterpart against what I know about myself, after all, in many ways we are remarkably similar."

"Spock you're not like—"

"Jim, I was able to understand some more of this man because I know what I am capable of and what I would never do. This man is very much like me, but has not such restrains in his acts and desires, the boundaries I have he does not, the core of both of us seems to be alike, but the surface is not," Spock closed his eyes, "I have a great number of shared memories of Khan's life regarding my counterpart... but I also have some of yours." 

Sudden realization of what Spock wanted to say hit him and with it a plan started to form in his mind. The idea was risky but if played right, it had better chances to work than attacking the other Enterprise full front. Jim had no delusion that the other crew wouldn't attack them and he was aware that combat was almost inevitable; they had to incapacitate the other Enterprise if they ever hoped to get Khan back. 

The ideas were running wild in his head, but he had to start somewhere. 

"Share them with me," Jim said firmly, almost not making it a request but an order, it was such sync thinking that made the corner of Spock's lip slightly rise as he nodded. He extended his hand and Jim let him place it over his face, feeling the familiar tug of the mind-meld, as done by the Elder Spock a few years back. 

This time the memories were a storm coming from a third party. Khan had generated a mental and emotional image of the other Kirk that made Jim shudder. It was a history of violent fights and getting what he wanted by sheer force and ruthless actions. 

His cleverness was not in question, his actions carried by the line of following means to an end. He rose from being no one to the Empire's brightest start, but the path behind him was stained in blood and he was proud of it. He earned his captain's chair with bloody hands and the recognition of the superiors who gave it to him. 

And Khan... Khan was a prize he got for serving the Empire. A prize he was fascinated with and will not let go. Khan belongs to him, because he earned him, he gained him.Khan was his.

Jim gasped, taking several steps backwards and stumbling to fall on the chair. He felt himself shudder with such intense sense of possessiveness. Running his hands over his face to refocus, Jim tried to sort the new memories and concentrate in how to interpret them. 

He noticed Spock had sat across the desk on the chair before it, silently waiting for Jim to say something. 

"How could you stand it?" Jim asked softly, "Having these emotions condensed inside you... they aren't yours and... fuck!"

"This is Khan's perception of your counterpart, but it may have as much as the real thing as what Khan feels, because apparently he enjoyed asking his first officer to force these memories in his prisoner's mind as a... reminder."

"What?" Jim blinked as a memory that was not his own started to make sense in his head. He saw himself asking Spock to use the meld to later inflict it upon his pet. Jim shook his head, not wanting to think of that person as himself, but understanding what Spock had done with his own shared memories of his counterpart. "I... need to think, but... stay?"

"Of course, Captain."

Spock folded his hands on his lap and closed his eyes, while Jim rested his chin on his hands and blinked slowly; fitting some pieces of a puzzle of memories he did not have as a whole, but would have to make do with what he had. 

He took his persona and mentally compared himself against the other Kirk, like looking himself in a mirror and spotting if anything was different in the reflection. He went deeper, thinking of this other Kirk not as a different person but what he could have been, in a different world, in a different time and why he would have been as such, if presented like so. 

It was a long time; silence stood among Captain and First officer as it passed, while in their minds was a whole different story. 

Finally, Jim snapped his eyes open, determination filling his gaze as he stared directly ahead with a plan in his mind and a resolution in his heart. "Mr. Spock, we're going to use those subspace warheads Khan brought with him."

Spock looked at his Captain in the eye, narrowing his eyes while thinking. The specs and reach of those weapons came to mind, "We can shoot at a great distance... even if we don't hit them directly the residual energy will destabilize their warp drive."

"Once their warp capacity is gone, Mr. Scott is going to help us get into that ship," Jim got to his feet, "But first, I need the files of the Terran Empire from the shuttle and a Replicator."

\----------

Jim stared at his image in the mirror. The black, tight pants and black shirt with dark goldenrod stripes along the shoulders adjusted to his body as if they were meant to be worn by him since the moment the garment was designed. Over the upper piece, the carbon greyand saffron vest made the three piece uniform lookas it was meant to be. However, it was the Starfleet insignia, the commemorative medals and most of all, the Terran Empire pin that made it look complete. 

He felt a stranger in his own body, dressed as a Captain of the Terran Empire in detail, from file and memory. The black boots fit perfectly as the dark gloves over his hands. He was the mirror image of the Captain of the ISS Enterprise, as planned. 

Behind him, Bones gave him a strange look, observing him up and down, unsure of what to make out of this. 

"Jim, you're risking too much," Bones put no real strength in the argument, making it sound more of an observation than complain. "I should go with you."

"No, it would be too many," Jim pointed out, his face set and serious, "I'm reluctant to let Spock come with me, but I know I shouldn't go alone."

"You don't even know where in the ship that copycat of yours is... is someone recognizes you—"

"Bones," Jim interrupted firmly, "I need you here because when we come back – and we're coming back, that's for sure – I have no idea how bad it's going to be."

Leonard gritted his teeth hard, reading in between the lines the fears Jim was not voicing. Bones read it well enough, as always: I have no idea how bad it's going to be for Khan.

"Jim..."

"This man got Khan as a recompense for his service. His dedication, his actions, as bloody and ruthless as they are, were gratified with his very own Slave Augment, a high honor as they were such... an exclusive and very limited property of the Empire." 

Jim had the memory of the first time the other Kirk looked at Khan. The man eyed him with a smirk on his face and licked his lips, nodding to himself in satisfaction. But it was Jim who deciphered the look behind that memory, digging into his own most dark impulses and locked thoughts. 

Kirk had the look that Jim himself would have had when finally obtaining something he'd wanted for a very long time. This made Jim wonder when, how and why the other him got this fascination with Khan, even if at the same time he dreaded to know the answer.

"Khan has defied him by escaping and he won't tolerate that," Jim closed his eyes, "He won't let anyone have Khan, even if that means destroying him."

Bones placed a hand over his shoulder, looking at Jim across the mirror with a concerned expression, "You are not him, Jim... and you are going to get Khan back."

A small smile adorned Jim's lips at his friend's words of comfort, "Thanks."

His communicator went off, letting Spock's voice fill the room, "Captain, we are ready."

"On my way."

Jim shared another look with Bones and together they departed to the bridge. 

\----------

Spock stood straight with his hands behind his back. If he was affected by wearing a replica of the uniform worn by the First Officer of the Terran Empire's Enterprise, he wasn't showing it. The black and blue jacket made him stand against the bridge's white design but it was the insignia, a Terran Empire's pin what made him uncomfortable, though he was not one to show it.

"Keptin on ze bridge!"

Several pairs of eyes immediately went to the sight of their Captain, Spock's included. If Spock's uniform made him stand out, Jim's was even worse and yet, for some reason, if fitted him in the most bizarre of manners. Jim was not playing the part yet, but he already looked different, which gave the impression that this plan of theirs may work. 

"Captain," Spock tilted his head to a side in greeting and Jim nodded in return, looking at this First Officer up and down for a moment before sitting on the chair and fixing his attention on screen, looking at the image of Engineering placing the subspace warheads in position to be fired, under the close supervision of Carol Marcus and Montgomery Scott. 

"Mr. Chekov, give me some good news," Jim kept a calm tone in his voice to mask any trace of nervousness in him, feeling he couldn't afford it. 

Pavel was quiet for a moment, moving his fingers fast of the console. Besides him Sulu was also working as fast as he could and soon both had the information requested ready to be displayed on screen. 

"Ze ship, Keptin..." Pavel displayed the image on screen, earing the gasp of several crew members. 

Before them was The Enterprise, only it was not. This ship had the outline of the Enterprise, the name displayed showed the ISS initial before it, not to mention the subtle but noticeable details of modifications that the ship had had over the years. There were parts that one could notice had been repaired very recently and even some marks left by what undoubtedly had to have been explosions that were not concealed just yet. 

This was a ship prepared for attack at any given moment and from the looks of it, her crew didn't hesitate to do it. 

"Miss Marcus," Jim called over the broadcast communication, "Are we ready?"

"Set and ready, Captain," Carol's image was displayed in a secondary, smaller screen. Behind her Scotty was closing one of the launching tubes of the ship, looking anxious, "Remember, out shields have to be up in order to avoid backlash of the residual energy from the attack."

"Understood, Mr. Sulu?"

"Ready Captain," Hikaru set the shields as requested and gave him concerned look over his shoulder, eyeing the uniform with an unsure expression. Jim made a brief eye contact with him, giving his navigation officer a sympathetic smile and a nod. Hikaru returned the short nod and locked the location of the other Enterprise in the system. 

Jim closed his eyes.

"Fire!"

\----------

Everything hurt, there was not a single part of his body that was not in agony, even after he had been taken out of the booth and laid of the soft surface of the bed, he was in so much pain he couldn't even think properly what was happening, all he knew is that he was in the last place he wanted to be.

Kirk was holding him against his frame, running his tongue over Khan's cheek in his disgusting mark of possession that made Khan's stomach roll and dread pool inside him, taking over him like phantom ropes that didn't let him move, freezing him in place as his eyes watched but didn't actually see. He was trying so hard to disassociate of the moment, to forget he was back in his worst nightmare, and to not let himself break. 

The touch was invasive, especially because he was laying naked in the bed; bereft of all clothing for his captor's sheer satisfaction and nothing more. Kirk watched him with hungry eyes and a predatory smirk, running his fingers across Khan's over sensitive body. The light touches felt like flames licking his skin, and the more pronounced ones like daggers piercing into him. He choked a sob, closing his eyes, refusing to look at his captor in the eye. 

He couldn't move and not for the lack of trying. He was not even tied up beyond the standard cuffs but his body was in so much pain it made no difference. He couldn't move because every single attempt was like dragging himself through a sword. Still, when Kirk went for his crotch, he moved to curl into himself in attempt to avoid the touch, he almost screamed with the agonizing pain such movement cost him but he didn't regret it. 

Kirk chuckled at what he considered a petty attempt of rebellion from his dear pet. He kissed the nape of Khan's neck, scrapping his teeth up his jaw and biting on the join between neck and shoulder hard enough to make the augment cry out in pain. Rivulets of blood ran down Khan's skin as Kirk sucked and licked in fascination, pleased with his work. 

Khan let out a shaky breath, blinking away the moisture in the corner of his eyes. His mind was in chaos; between the beating and the exposure to the agony booth's high levels of punishment, thinking was a task proven too hard for him at the moment, but even with his mind in such lethargic state, the reality and gravity of the situation didn't escape him. He was trapped and the near future looked too dim for him. 

Dark thoughts started to cross his mind. The possibility to find a way to end his misery permanently promptly crossed his mind, but he was quick to shake it away. He couldn't let himself be overwhelmed by such thoughts, or it would be the first sign that he had been truly defeated.

As if his own will was trying to give him something to anchor himself, he remembered the last few days, where the first taste of real freedom in three hundred years had been given to him. It was so real and so unlike what he had ever felt, that it was impossible for him to not get attached to it rather quickly. He found himself remembering his time in the ship that mirrored the one he was trapped in right now, but in a contrast that made it almost too difficult to be real. Yet actions prove more than words and Jim's actions had spoken to him loud and clear.

He found himself wondering if the others would miss him... or even notice he was gone. He was afraid of the answer, because what if everything had been just in his head? A foolish attempt to get some sort of sense in a lie that had left him shattered beyond repair? 

As Kirk forced him on his back to steal a kiss from his lips, shoving his tongue into his mouth in an aggressive, possessive gesture, Khan questioned his sanity. 

He whimpered in Kirk's mouth, and the captain laughed in return, moving to whisper obscenities in his ear; a promise of the ordeal to come. Khan closed his eyes, wishing that if this was a nightmare someone would give him the mercy of waking him up. 

Kirk's lips were on his neck when the world around him was rocked with such force it threw them from the bed. The force of it sent him against the nearest wall, the pain of his collision mixed with the agony of his overflowed system forcing a scream from his throat. The shock almost made him pass out, and Kirk roughly pulling him up by his hair to force him against his body was not helping him at all. 

He didn't know what was happening, but he felt like falling before hitting the floor, the walls and then falling again. It was like being tossed inside a jar and then have someone shake it without mercy. Khan's confused mind took longer than he would like to remember he was on a ship and said ship was probably under some unstable conditions. 

After the violent turns stopped, Kirk held him for a little bit longer, cursing under his breath before unceremoniously tossing Khan onto the bed. 

"Spock, what the hell happened to my ship?!" 

The disrupted sound of the ISS Enterprise's First Officer filled the air, however Khan barely register what was being said. 

"It appears our ship was attack—"

"Aren't you smart?! Tell me something I don't know, goddam it!" 

"My apologies..." he sounded as he was speaking behind clenched teeth, "We require your presence on the bridge Capt—"

"Of course you do! Fucking idiots..." Kirk tossed something across the room and gave a frustrated groan, moving over Khan to kneel on the bed besides him, speaking softly in his ear, with a sickening sweetness that made the Augment shiver. "I'll be back for you later, pet."

Kirk adjusted the cuffs to the bed and threw a blanket over Khan before leaving him alone almost suffocating in pain and exhaustion. He tugged at his bonds with no result, wondering why he had not passed out already. His heavy breathing and swallowed sobs filled the room while Kirk's promises of punishment encircled his mind.

\---------

Kirk stumbled in the Captain's chair, annoyance clear in his features as he grounded his teeth and glared at the screen with such fierce intensity that if he could it would be on fire. He closed his eyes, moving forward to rest his elbows on his knees and interweave his fingers, lowering his chin over his hands.

"Are you telling that our warp capacity has been disable?" Kirk's voice was calm, almost sweet and that sent a shiver down the command crew's spine. On screen, Scott narrowed his eyes, flexing the mechanic fingers of his left hand.

"Aye, Captain..."

"So, we're stuck here."

"For the moment..."

"Hmmm... how interesting, don't you think, Spock?" 

"It seems highly improbable that we happened to be in the trajectory of an attack supposedly not aimed directly to us. Although it is not impossible, as we are in hostile territory, Captain."

Kirk's eyes moved towards his right were his First Officer stood as always, arms folded over his chest, eyes closed and that blank expression Kirk loved to shatter every time he had the chance. 

"That much is true," Kirk moved to rest his back on the chair, supporting his chin on his hand. His expression changed for one of boredom as his eyes scanned the reports of the damage done to the ship and they are where they had been left adrift, "Can you repair my ship, Scott?"

"It will take time, but yes, I can do it, Captain," Hissed the Chief Engineer, narrowing his eyes while calculating his captain's next reaction. It could either go right for him or it would be another round of screams and people ending in medbay. 

"Then. Do. It."

"Yes Captain."

The image was cut. Kirk glared at the screen, slowly exhaling in a vain attempt to control his temper. His glare shifted to his First officer, who opened his eyes in sync, silence hanging between them.

"How curious that we happened to be in the path of a ship with subspace technology," Kirk got up, motioning Spock to follow him. They walked off the bridge, Kirk ahead of Spock, "Right after we got our dear Khan back."

"The signature of the attack is remarkably similar to our weapons," Spock pointed out, noting they were en route to the Captain's quarters. 

"You did mention that the shuttle Khan stole was loaded for battle," Kirk tilted his head to a side, flexing his arms, "And the shuttle we took down was not a problem, as shooting down a battle-ready shuttle would have been."

Something dark crossed Spock's eyes when his Captain stopped to look at him over his shoulder with a disappointed expression, "I may have made a mistake."

"Hmm..."

Kirk was on him in a second, his gloved fingers pulling the short black hair straws as he forced Spock's head down. The First Officer kept his balance and twisted his hands into firsts, closing his eyes and gritting his teeth but not fighting back. His Captain moved closer, whispering in his ear. 

"We have company."

Spock snapped his eyes open, nodding into his Captain's grip. Kirk slowly let him go, staring straight ahead of him with a smirk in his lips that Spock had not seen on him over a long time. The first Officer followed his Captain's line of vision, finding standing a few feet from him an almost exact copy of his captain. 

Kirk's grin just got wider, almost dripping excitement. 

"This just got interesting."

Jim took his weapon out, aiming it towards the Terran Captain, mirroring his expression with ease, showing his toothy smile. 

"I couldn't have said it any better."


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ehm… stuff happen, but I'm feeling better now and here's a new chapter for you all, sorry for the delay! Thanks to BotanyCameos for being awesome and helping me out with the revision.

Kirk walked in a slow lazy circle in the hallway, his first officer not too far behind ready to intervene when commanded. The Terran captain eyed his inter dimensional double with far more satisfaction that was perhaps healthy as the other dew closer to him.

"I read the theory of parallel dimensions when I was a teen," Kirk said casually, "Never gave it much thought, but for obvious reasons, seems it wasn't that far from the truth."

Jim was circling his double in the same motion Kirk was walking; unlike the Terran captain, he was tense but hiding it behind a well-placed grin on his face, "I'm not like you."

"Ah, but you don't know that," Kirk pointed out, giving Jim a flash of a smile, "The basics must be alike, surely you grew up in Iowa and hate it."

Jim wisely choose not to respond to that but the flash in his eyes gave Kirk the answer he needed, "And let me guess, wasn't Christopher Pike the one that got you out of that hellhole?"

"So both came from Iowa, big deal," Jim hissed, "It means nothing."

"It means everything," Kirk moved closely to his first officer and ran his fingers across his cheek making the Vulcan close his eyes in silence, "I wonder about the others and how you met them." 

Kirk nibbled the skin under the Vulcan's jaw and Jim saw the other Spock's hand tremble for a second, the display made him feel somehow troubled and his heart raced a little bit faster; Spock only mentioned that his reflection was completely loyal to his captain, he never quite mention this.

"What about our dear Sawbones?" Kirk let go of the other Spock and came closer to move in a circle before his double again, "Bet you meet him when joining Starfleet."

Jim was getting frustrated by the charade, he didn't want to know how alike his double's life was to his, in the end they were antithesis of each other, at least according to Khan and the memories Spock relied to him. 

"Cut the crap," Jim adjusted his weapon, "You know why I'm here."

"Oh, and you expect me to just let you get him? He's mine!" The powerful hiss of possessiveness and more than a bit of lust made Jim shudder, that was his voice claiming someone else as a possession, it felt strange to listen to it.

"You have no right to do what you did... you just have no right!" Jim was getting angry, remembering everything that his other-self had done to Khan made the sentiment rise and boil.

"See? That's not true," Kirk laughed at him, "Maybe in your world you have no right to possess him but in mine I own him and for that I can do whatever I want to him, and that's a big difference between you and me... maybe you thought of the many things you wanted to do to him but I made them happen!"

Jim felt the fury finally take the best of him and he charged against his double in anger, but Kirk laughed even when he was wrestled to the floor and punched in the face. He rolled over to have Jim under him and returned the violent gesture and soon both of them were engaged in a fight with far more sentiment than initially indented by Jim and exactly the one Kirk expected.

The First Officer of the ISS Enterprise observed the confrontation in front of him with a strange fascination. His hands securely gripped the agonizer in his hold but his attention was focused on the scene before him.

A blur of black and golden, blue eyes and blonde hair in pairs fighting as if there was no one else present. The smirk in his Captain's lips could easily be confused with the grin of the impostor, even if his keen eye were not following the confrontation close, the mistake could have been easily made, because it was like watching reflections fight each other.

Out of instinct more than anything else, the Vulcan followed the rapid movements of the impostor with his aim, the agonizer ready to shoot, yet he was holding back as punches and kicks were served, as if hypnotized by what he was seeing.

Jim twisted on the floor to push Kirk off him, rolling them over to get the Empire's captain on his back and kick the agonizer off his hand, he had lost his own phaser a few moments ago but that was not what irked him the most.

Kirk was enjoying the fight.

The psycho was enjoying every minute of the confrontation, striking with a strength Jim didn't know someone with essentially his same mass could have, fighting with the speed of a great feline and savoring every minute of it. The hunt, the fight, Kirk lived for it and its results and now he was essentially fighting himself and proving to be a better predator.

Yet, Jim was not far behind. 

He might not be a predator but he was not defenseless, he was in fact a worthy adversary, knowing where to dodge and when to attack. He used his own agility as his advantage and the applied strength as his weapon. Jim was no predator, he was a defender and he knew how who defend what he cared for, mirror images be dammed, he was not giving up, that wasn't an option.

The fight was too level; it was like watching two storms collide. Instead of one overshadowing the other, it looked as if they were combining. If not for the fact their movements were against each other, anyone would believe their actions were a planned routine.

"Spock, shoot him!"

The command was said at the same time and it echoed in the hallway, taking the stunned first officer out of his stupor and to action. Identical expressions waiting for him expectantly and the Vulcan narrowed his eyes.

"Captain,"

That was not him, the first officer looked up in surprise to see his reflection pointing a weapon and his Captain laughed at his surprise, he should have seen this coming, of course the impostor was not alone.

It didn't matter.

The first officer concealed a grin and shot at the same time his double did, both beams colliding with the same target.

Spock pointed his phaser at the first officer, who in turn was not watching him but his unconscious captain on the floor being moved by the impostor. His expression was neutral, he almost looked bored.

"You did not miss," Spock said evenly and the first officer nodded in respond.

"No, I didn't."

Jim pushed Kirk away and looked between Spock and his double, unsure of what was happening, unless the intention was to take down his own Captain, the Empire's first officer had obviously missed.

The first officer calmly walked over his fallen Captain, making Jim tense with the approach, eying wearily the weapon the Vulcan still held in his hand. The other Spock kneeled on the floor, brushing the hair off his Captain's face before giving Jim a look that could freeze a sun.

"I assume you are here to take Khan from us," the first officer took something from Kirk's jacket, getting up while holding a card in his hand and motioning Jim to take it, "You may use this."

Jim eyed Spock's double warily and slowly reached for the card, the other Spock quickly took him by the wrist and planted a quick kiss on Jim's lips, taking him by surprise and stunning him by his actions. The other Spock moved quickly, letting Jim have the card and moving to his fallen Captain's side with satisfied smile on his face.

Jim blinked once, twice, before backing up and almost colliding with Spock, who was glaring at his double with disdain.

"Mr. Spock..." he said behind clenched teeth and the First Officer chuckled, pointing to the direction of the Captain's headquarters.

"You may want to tell your Captain to pretend to be someone he is not," the first officer motioned to his fallen Captain, "At least until you get out of here."

"You are not doing this for the goodness of your heart," Spock remarked coldly and the other Spock chuckled.

"Of course not," He got up with the unconscious Kirk in his embrace, "That would simply be... illogical."

"I... see..." Spock looked angrily at his counterpart and Jim was still a bit stunned but shook his head, moving towards the direction the Captain's headquarters were located.

"I will, ehem... yeah," Jim pointed towards the direction and moved past the first officer and his other self, looking troubled by what just happened.

The First officer stopped side to side from Spock, his eyes fixed in the man in his arms while his more morally composed double stared ahead, no doubt wanting to run after his own Captain.

"Give a kiss to Khan from me, will you? I'm going to miss him."

"I do not understand," Spock confessed lightly, avoiding looking at his double.

"It's quite simple, Mr. Spock..." he leaned to whisper in his double's ear, "I don't want my Captain to be so distracted of me for a while."

Spock's gaze shot to his side, encountering his double's sinister expression, "You... planned this?"

"No." He chuckled, "I just left my lab unlocked for Carol to enter and take away a sealed case... I might have overlooked the security tapes from Engineering and maybe I did not pay enough attention into calculating the trajectory of our dear Augment's shuttle... maybe I was just bored."

"That's not logical—"

"But it is, Mr. Spock... it is logical when you want what I want... it was only logical," He didn't like to see that expression on his own face, it felt alarmingly wrong, "You better hurry."

"I cannot trust you."

"And you shouldn't," the first officer said, walking pass him, "My captain will want his pet back and I will get him back for him someday, and do remember I have a liking of said pet of my own. I have just not decided when that is going to happen just yet, probably not soon, but still... you better take that chance now that you have it, before I change my mind."

The first officer reached the corner of the hallway and smiled at him over his shoulder, "Live long and prosper, Mr. Spock!"

Spock took a deep breath, trying to calm his racing heart, forgetting the ghost of his own voice on his ears and ran after Jim.

\----------

Jim stopped near the corner of the hallway that would take him to the captain's quarters. He took a deep breath and adopted a cool exterior, putting on a mask of cynicism and walking with an indifferent expression in case he found someone from the crew. He had to be a soldier of the Empire for a while, as much as he disliked the idea, he was close to his target, so he was going to play the role. 

His short but unexpectedly meaningful encounter with Spock's counterpart left him a bit shell shocked and unsure of the intentions of the Empire's First Officer, but mostly confused as he definitely did not expected such a strange display of... Mockery? Jim had no idea what to think of his friend's double, only that he was a lot more forward than Spock and he was not sure that was a good thing, Spock was forward enough already and not so physical.

A not so subtle glow of embarrassment tainted Jim's cheeks at the remembrance of the encounter and he was quick to let it go, he couldn't afford to lose concentration now, he had to find Khan, he would worry about the rest later, once Khan was safe.

Settling his mind and concentrating in the objective of the mission once again, Jim walked down the hall and towards the room that was mostly likely like his own yet different. He was unsure of what he was to find, he just hoped it was not too late.

Jim took a deep breath as he stood before the door and flashed the card over the security pad, then typed what he hoped was the correct code, hoping that his counterpart held the same number in memory as he did. 

It took a couple of seconds, but the number did register and the access was granted. Although he was hoping the code to be the same, the significance behind this left him a little upset. The knowledge that his mirror-self had also stood in the coordinates of Tarsus IV at some point in time gave him an unpleasant after taste. He forced himself to let it pass, telling himself that he did not want to know if the story had been the same, no... He didn't want to know. 

Jim entered the room and the door slid closed once he was inside, leaving the room in full darkness, but he was able to perceive a shape over the bed before the light of the hallway was blocked. His heart sank.

"Lights, 45%," he didn't want to startle Khan; at least he told himself that. Reality was he didn't want to see firsthand what his double had done, thinking the worse had happened and he was already too late. He was being irrational, he had to look, but he couldn't help but feel guilty that Khan got captured.

He was cuffed and said cuffs fixed to the bed, it looked like a far more simply set than the DNA coded manacles he had already seen, but he was far more concerned for the damage he might find under the thin sheet covering him and the fact that Khan had not reacted at all. His eyes screwed tightly shut, his head turned to the side.

Jim undid the cuffs, sitting beside Khan and gently touched his face. The Augment flinched and made an unhappy sound. Jim found himself wincing at the reaction. 

"Khan?"

The brunet opened his eyes and Jim went cold, feeling the weight of a hate stare mixed with such amount of fear that made his chest ache; he had never had such stare aimed at him before and he couldn't understand how the other Kirk could smirk being in the receiving end of such hatred. 

"L-Leave me alone..."

"But..." Jim almost slapped himself, of course Khan would confuse him. He obviously was in pain and not in his best health, not to mention Jim was wearing the uniform of his captor. Jim risked a touch and carefully placed his hands on Khan's face, gently cradling it as he get closer and touched his forehead against Khan's in what he hoped was a calming gesture, "I'm not going to hurt you."

Khan stopped breathing the second Jim touched his face, but when his forehead touched the other in a gesture of thrust, something in him shifted. He remembered a smile that didn't make him uneasy and a touch that didn't make him flinch.

"Jim?"

"Yeah…" 

Jim helped him to sit up and smiled at him. Khan blinked several times, stunned in surprise of seeing the other man here, because this was Jim, it was really Jim. He touched he captain's chest noticing the small almost unnoticeable differences in the suit but mostly the man wearing it. This was not the Captain of the Empire's flagship, this was the man who helped him once and now was back to help him. This was proof that his calming dream of a better life had been, after all, real.

He couldn't help it, his shoulders trembled and his breath hitched, he rested his forehead against' Jim's chest, feeling the warm of the other man as he enfolded him in his arms, making sooting noises and telling him that everything was going to be fine. Khan nodded, believing Jim's words and taking them to heart, because now he knew Jim was being nothing but truthful. 

Jim cradled Khan's neck, feeling the other man relax in his embrace little by little and he found himself smiling. He found him, he was going to take him out of this place and leave this behind; Jim had to make that happen, he was determinate to do so. 

"It's okay," Jim whispered, "it's okay, I'm here, we're going to be fine."

Khan nodded against Jim's chest; it feel good, to finally be able to trust someone again.

\----------

Spock laid his Captain on the biobed of the ISS Enterprise sick bay, his expression blank and carefully indifferent. That didn't stop Bones from roughly shoving him aside and hovering over Kirk, annoyance showing in his face.

"What the hell happen?!"

"We have intruders in the ship," Spock was moving to leave sickbay as he spoke, "I must take care of the security bridge immediately."

"Not so fast hobgoblin!" Bones took Spock by the wrist and yanked him back, "How the hell they got Jim?"

"He appears to have been shot, Doctor." Spock shook Bones off him again, "Now, I must find the responsible."

"Yeah, you do that." 

Bones eyed Spock suspiciously, but let him go anyway, action that conflicted the Vulcan. He had to act quickly; he was running out of time already.

\----------

Jim had no technical details of what the 'Agony Booth' was supposed to do, but the name itself was a giveaway, so he had an idea. Currently he was watching the after effects of a prolonged exposure to said nasty device. He felt his blood boil as Khan struggled to move and hissed in discomfort as the normally comfortable non ranked standard clothes hurt him by merely brushing his skin on contact. Khan was looking a bit better than when he found him, but he was not fine and his slow recovery made Jim wonder if there was more to it than the exposure to the punishment device.

"I will be fine," Khan insisted with the most reassuring tone he could muster while still in visible agony by merely being on his feet, "It will pass."

Jim wasn't convinced, but time was not on their side and he would have to make do with what they had. In his case a barely conscious augment and the dubious favor of the First Officer of the Empire's Flagship.

"This probably will hurt you but..." Jim moved to take Khan's arm and place it over his shoulder, supporting Khan's weight as he moved his other arm to Khan's waist, "Sorry."

"Hm' fine," Khan's eyes were tightly shut and he was doing a conscious effort to not pant. Sweat beads had already formed on his brow but Jim chose not to point it out. 

They walked out of the room and across the hallway with no disturbance. Khan glanced over the corridor as they reached the end of the section and gently pushed Jim away from him.

"Khan?"

"If someone sees us," Khan took a deep breath, feeling tired from the short walk already, "They will notice right away."

Jim nodded in silence, but that didn't keep him from hovering a hand over the small of Khan's back as they walked, Khan using the wall for support and Jim worryingly looking around. 

"Eet iz zhis way," a shy voice startled them, Jim more than Khan, who looked worse by the second. Jim turned around to look at Pavel standing on the middle of the hallway, his black and golden uniform giving away the fact that this Chekov was part of the Terran Empire's Flagship crew. 

Jim was about to use his phaser when Khan's voice stopped him in motion and he didn't have to tell him to stop, it was just the way he spoke the name that made Jim flinch, "Andre...!"

The young ensign smiled at Khan, "Eet iz good to see you, Khan."

Khan almost tumbled over when approaching the younger man, but Pavel was quick to move and helped him to stay on his feet, "I thought… He said…"

"Nyeht," he said evenly, "Thought iz was zust as bad, a wittle bit"

"Hm' sorry..."

"You must follow me," Pavel eased Khan of his arms and towards Jim, "Your Spock iz waiting, come on!"

The alarm echoed in the hallways a few seconds later, the message of intruders aboard the ship was widely transmitted while the First Officer's voice detailed the situation. Jim feel dread of the danger coming closer, feeling how close they were already but not done yet. 

Together they followed the ensign towards the transport room, where Spock was indeed waiting and looked visibly relieved when they entered the room. Spock was quick to move and help Jim support Khan towards the transport platform. 

"Spock?" Jim's gaze moved from his First Officer towards the young ensign, a question lingering in his silence. 

"It appears my double has plans of his own." Spock did not elaborate and Jim was not sure if he wanted him to do so at the moment. Khan lifted his head to look at Pavel, who quickly said something in Russian and Khan nodded in return. 

Jim felt the familiar buzz of the transporter around him as the image of the ship morphed from the Terran Empire's flagship to their own Enterprise, just before Khan's eyes rolled into the back of his head and his weight was entirely supported by Jim and Spock. 

\----------

Scans across the ship and multiple security searches showed that there was no one that might pose a threat aboard the ISS Enterprise. The report also confirmed the fact that a certain Augment was missing. There was also the problem that the use of the blue matter along the red matter had damaged part of the ship, thus making another execution of the anomaly unstable. 

Or so the report said. 

Kirk narrowed his eyes, clutching the edges of the PADD, gritting his teeth and letting the anger simmer inside him. The silence in his ready room was heavy and ironically said more than any words, right now it was screaming for blood and announcing danger. The Captain lowered the report with cold calm and a blank expression, making Spock's hands twitch behind his back. 

"Do you have an ETA for the repairs?" his voice was unusually calm and it was the giveaway that there was going to be a hell to pay for the next few days aboard the ship.

"Not yet, Sir—"

Spock found himself facedown over Kirk's desk, with his arms being painfully twisted behind his back. The Vulcan closed his eyes, exhaling hard to calm his own breathing as his Captain looked down at him with a bored expression. 

"You are a lousy liar, Spock," Kirk mumbled. 

A few people have dared to try and trick Kirk, few of those had gotten away with it. Reading Spock was easy, he knew the Vulcan very well and with the years had learned the subtle signs that would tell him more than words as well as his lousy attempts at deception. It was easier for Spock to bend the truth or omit it than actually lying, an act of defiance to his own logical nature. Kirk considered it cute when he tried, because it was just such an amusing experience for Kirk to remind the Vulcan of his place, under him. Kirk's expression morphed into a sadistic grin that promised far too much, desirable and undesirable events that would mark themselves as the consequences of Spock's actions. 

"Tsk, Tsk, Tsk..." Kirk pushed Spock harder against the desk. "Lying to your Captain, that was a very bad idea, don't you think?"

The Vulcan hid his own smirk, maybe his plan did not end with quite the expected results as a whole, but it came close. He would have to make do with such. 

Kirk leaned over him, whispering in his ear, "You need to be put in your place and once we're done with that, you will get me my pet back, understood?"

Spock hissed as Kirk bit down his sensitive ear and nodded quickly, not trusting his voice at the moment. He was going to get Khan back for his Captain... just, not yet. 

Khan should be very grateful for that.


	9. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no excuse. Sorry for the delay.

It's a warm day on earth and San Francisco is having its usual daily motion. People come and go in their normal lives, all of them focused in their own struggles as time goes by and the day continues. Khan identifies, somehow, with these people, as he is struggling with his own demons now. Someone would said that it's human nature to be selfish, to think our troubles are the most important, ignoring others as we deal with our personal problems, working for a resolution, no matter the scale of the subject. 

In reality, being concern of your own life is not being selfish. It quiet normal to think about yourself and only take into account those around you when you think of your pain and your problems, strangers go by all the time, thinking about their own lives, looking for their own answers and this is not a bad thing. 

"How do you feel today?" 

The voice is soft, even caring and it makes Khan feel safe, Doc. Kelly is a nice woman, with a far extensive knowledge of the human mind and its mysteries, she took into account his experiences, his origins and his knowledge when talking to him, for her he was not a poor victim, but an unfortunate casualty of a situation that was out of his hands. He liked that, it made him feel better about himself and everything that happened. 

"I had a nightmare last night," he commented while looking out the window, the sky was clear and the noise from outside was concealed by the glass, but observing the world turn outside allowed him to talk easily than looking at her in the eye all the time, "However, I was able to go back to sleep shortly after."

"Not so bad then?"

After a minute of silence, he answered, "I feel detached."

She made a short movement with her fingers across the PADD and then set it aside, looking at him calmly, waiting for him to continue. This was one of many sessions he had had with her, by this point Dr. Kelly was well aware of Khan's patters; when to ask, when to wait and when to change the subject. 

He liked her. 

"I didn't see myself in the dream…" he continued, "The things that were happening were familiar, I experienced events alike to those, but it wasn't my own self reliving them this time, it felt as they were happening to someone else and I was just a very vivid spectator." 

Clouds passed by, casting shadows on the ground outside and Khan thought of James, exploring the vast space alongside the crew of the USS Enterprise. 

"Perhaps, in due time, I won't considers such dreams to be nightmares anymore… just odd dreams of an unconscious mind." 

Dr. Kelly slimed when she thought Khan wasn't looking and he felt like smiling himself. 

According to his calendar and James last call, they were due to return in two days. Khan was looking forward to the event, as after months of the event that brought them together called for a reunion, one were Kahn won't feel like a stranger in his own skin. 

Perhaps, this was what healing felt like.

\----------

Spock made the official report, giving detailed information about the effects of the blue matter, the colliding of dimensions and the after effects the crew members directly involved with the crossing of spaces in between their dimension and the parallel one they came across. 

The report also listed Khan as a refugee, noting the Imperial system the parallel dimension he came from and their encounter with the crew of the "ISS Enterprise", there were testimonies supporting this and the process for granting the official asylum was not difficult, after all the Khan they were taking into their protection was not the one involved in the terrorists attacks from its counterpart. 

Months after the report was submitted, the petition accepted and life came to a sort of peace like stamp, Spock was not entirely satisfied with the results. He felt that so much more could have been done, the fact that their possibilities to do so were limited only fueled his frustration. 

James, on the other hand, was just happy to be as far away as possible from that version of himself he came to hate so much in such a short time. 

It bother him that he couldn't actively say Khan was safe though, but it didn’t stop him from trying to, someone day, feel confident enough to say it. 

\----------

James was silent that day and that made the crew a bit twitchy, because their captain was never silent, not for long. Still, Sulu continue to report their arrival with no incident and James answered in a mechanical way while Spock gave him a disapproving stare, same James ignored. 

They were back on Earth after months or exploring, normally he wouldn't be so relaxed of coming back to Earth, James happens to like exploring space, but this time he was coming back to check on the situation he left behind months ago, not willingly, mind you, but still felt guilty about it. 

After the incident where Khan was taken from their custody and subsequent rescue, the USS Enterprise and her crew when back to base to report. The incident was kept restricted and no announcement was made by the Federation and James was fine with that. 

However, Khan was to remain on Earth, as his psychological state was unstable and he required physical recovery. James was not keen to such idea, but Bones offered to remain on Earth as well to keep an eye on the Augment. 

He was nervous, to be perfectly honest. 

James didn't want to leave Khan, but he knew it was for the best, both of them knew. Now he is back, submitting a report and making time, forcing himself to not run straight to the Medical Center, to not call Bones every five minutes to know more about Khan, it was taking him all his self control.

"James," he voice startled him, making him turn around to be face to face with Bones, "Just go, he's in the recreation area."

"But I—"

"GO!"

"Okay, okay… Jezz!"

Bones took the report from him and pointed in the direction James was to follow, it didn't took him long to reach a nice space with soft grass and a few threes around a sidewalk, and that's where he saw him.

Khan was sitting on a bench in the shade of a large three, reading a book. He looked calm, not like that person he rescued a few months ago, same one that was unable to sleep because the terrors followed him from another dimension. 

He swallowed, walking towards the other man and once he was just a couple feet from him, Khan looked up from his book and smiled. 

"Hey Khan…"

"James."

They stared at each other in silence, a smile on their faces. James finally moved to sit beside him and the silence was not uncomfortable at all. 

They were going to be fine, in time.


End file.
